10 Things Never to Say to Wealthy Clients

2. “I have no idea what the market is doing. I don’t watch it anymore.”

This is a curse of managed money. You aren’t making day-to-day trading suggestions, so you focus on service and building relationships. Unfortunately, the statement sounds like you don’t care if they make or lose money.

Instead: When I was a new advisor, my manager insisted we check what the market was doing (and why) before we went out to lunch, in case someone asked us “How’s the market?” You want to have an answer.

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3. Fees are going up (but I’m not telling you).

No one wants to deliver bad news. The logic is, “If I don’t bring it up, maybe they won’t notice.” They will notice. If they don’t, their accountant will tell them. They will read about it in an article, in print or online.

Instead: Take ownership. “We are updating our free schedule. Some items are going up, others are not. Here’s what’s happening and why we are making these changes.”

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4. “You’re rich…You can afford it.”

The unspoken message is “You are rich. I’m not. We are different. I’m envious.” It creates distance, perhaps even sounding adversarial.

Instead: “I know that car you mentioned sounds expensive. It’s a good brand and they make a great product. It might be expensive, but you’ve heard the expression ‘You get what you pay for.’ I hope you enjoy it.”

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5. “I was supposed to call you? No, you must be mistaken.”

You missed a call or there was a miscommunication. Don’t try shifting the blame to them.

Instead: “I’m sorry. I thought our call was at 10 a.m., not 9. Your time is valuable. I don’t want this to happen again. Going forward, I’ll send a confirming email (or use the scheduling tool) to confirm the time.”

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6. “Call me during business hours. I switch off at 5 p.m.”

If they are a captain of industry, they don’t switch off. They call their next-tier managers at all hours if something needs immediate attention. It’s their version of the rules of the road. The unspoken message is “You are important, but not that important.”

Instead: I told friends who became clients: “I will only call you about business during business hours. You aren’t held to the same rule.” The reply would often be: “We understand you should have your private time.”

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7. “Only the little people pay taxes.”

It’s a famous Leona Helmsley quote. It implies the only people who pay them are those who are too dumb to avoid them. It has a ring of illegality about it.

Instead: “Tax law changes are coming. I assume you have a good accountant who helps you in that area.” If they don’t, you could offer to supply a few names and business cards of CPAs you consider good and ethical.

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8. “I can’t take their account. It’s too small.”

They will stop referring people if you pick and choose. They have extended themselves, now they need to tell this other person it’s a “no go.” They lose face.

Instead: “I’m glad to talk to them. Let me see if I or my firm would be able to help them.” You might take the account on yourself. You might ask your manager for an exception. Perhaps it could be included in the household, since it’s a relative. (But not added to the consolidated statement.) Perhaps your advice is general and free. Maybe the part of the firm handling smaller accounts gives them the help they need.

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9. “Easy come, easy go.”

It implies money has no value. It trivializes losses. It also comers across as “I don’t care if you lost money.”

Instead: “You are right. That idea didn’t work out. Let’s look at the bigger picture…”

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10. “It’s my way or the highway.”

It’s another way of saying: “To be my client, you need to do everything I say.” You aren’t the only advisor out there. Others are competing for their business. They might decide to make that move.

Instead: “Here’s what I think we should do and the reasons why…”

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