Tongue in Cheek

               

 

 

               

French Husband found this at a brocante and rushed over to me exclaiming he found something he knew I would love.

I loved that he was so happy.

He gets the imperfection perfection concept.

 

               

 

The tender dance of grieving

two steps forward one step back

 

In grief, loving hurts

then it heals

 

in a tempo with uneven steps

 

until the rhythm

becomes fluid

with heart and mind

 

with the delicate steps 

of sweet sorrow

slowly becomes 

soften edges.

 

 

 

...

               

As today was a glorious warm spring day one like we haven’t seen in while I packed the stroller with what we might need to spend the entire day outside. As you probably know when you are with a baby be it with a stroller, a car, or on a plane it seems like everything in the house tags along: A change of clothes, diapers, diaper wipes, water,...

               

 

Gabriel wore his apple hat from V

We had the best day

hanging out with the columns

at the Palais Royal.

 

               

 

We finally or I should say I finally gave in to comfort and pleasing my children and son in law.

Gabriel calls the new sofa a boat “bateau” and he has it right. 
We can sail away in it!

 

               

 

 

Evening falls,

the sky grows dark,

the moon comes up,

and stars bloom like flowers.

 a constant change

earth and sky

subtle and strong

the water flows

 

Down below in the silence,

in the stillness, in the darkness...

the garden grows unafraid.

               

 

 
Look who climbed up on the chair.

 

               

 

In lieu of flowers, 

I would wish for you to flower. 

I would wish for you to blossom, to open, to be beautiful…

I would wish for you to align your soul,

for a time, with flowers.

~ Shawna Lemay

               

A lovely video about my brother Marty.

 

Yesterday Marty's body was laid to rest

My family had a private mass in our hometown

Sacha was one of the pallbearers along with other nieces and nephews.

A graveside service followed and cousins and friends were there.

My cousin Julie (Sacha's Godmother) had me on video so I could be there in...

               

At first glance I thought the oil painting I found at the brocante  was of an Angel sleeping but after a closer look it is of a young man who has taken off his clothes for a swim, and later resting while using a bunch of twigs as a head rest which at a glance look like Angel wings.

Or maybe it is an earthly Angel in disguise. 

...

               

A poem by my friend Claire.

Follow her in Instagram 

clairedelune96

 

               

When an American living in France 

makes Spanakopita

in honor of her Greek friend

Annie. Though I never saw her make it

and that doesn't matter.

 

----------------

 

 

 

Two farm eggs

feta cheese

sliced green onions

dried cranberries

chopped walnuts

fresh spinach

garlic

creme fraiche

salt and pepper...

               

 

 

Faithful as winter comes to an end in Cassis

the first Irises bloom.

Cheering whoever listens, "Spring is near!"

Oh at last.

This winter with its dreadful notes left behind...

Spring comes!

How I long for you!

 

 

               

 

 

 

The Silver Dark Sea

 

"We carry them with us...

We breathe for them,

sing for them,

soak up stories they cannot hear.

We think,

“They would have loved this...”

And we smile for them, on their behalf.

And someday,

after mastering the winds,

the waves,

the tides and gravity,

we shall harness for God

...

               

 

The face of time. Old photos. Stories told, untold, retold...

then, now and then over again.

Our stories play out, we each have a part.

Digging at the brocante photos unearthed 

in a soap tin held together with a rubber band.

The soap tin had a tag it said:

"Photographs from the Canebiere, Marseilles"

 

Photo...

               

               

               

 

 

 

What I saw at the French Antique auction online

was so beautiful that I felt maybe it was the Louvre

secretly selling off pieces.

Of course, that wasn't true

nevertheless the quality

and the masterpieces of the antiques on auction

were literally stunning and oftentimes unbelievable 

that they were being...

               

 

 

 

 

Gabriel received his third vaccine.

He didn't take it well and threw up a day or two later.

A few days later his parents were worshiping the porcelain god.

Since I have had a horrible cold to the point I 

was convinced I had covid (two PCR tests) but do not I could not help them.

Yann went to babysit...

               

via Beverly Coulson Mason’s Facebook.

 

 

 

               

 

 

 

 

Their wooly coats

worn in the chilly Provencal air

as they feast on the first green sprouts

while almonds trees bloom

My daily walk reminds me that life continues 

season by season

step by step

sunlight to moonlight

holy and pure.

---

Thank you again and again.

               

 

Merci 

I am in awe of your kindness and thoughtfulness

what an abundance I have to lean on.

I feel guilty for not responding to each of you personally!

My mother said the same thing the other day. She has received many cards, letters, flowers,

food, visit, and acts of kindness... she is overwhelmed by the love and support.

On...

               

 

somedays

grief grabs hold 

starring me down

like a chunk of gooey messy stuff

or like a chunk of sadness leaning on me

Grief has a road map all its own.

There is little to do but ride with it

even if it is unbearable.

 

               

 

 

 

No Hard Feelings 

Avett Brothers

 

I have listened to this song nearly every day since I heard about my brother's cancer

the words often make me cry

tears of so many reasons-

so truly true of grief and letting go and letting be and being ready.

The song asks, "Will I be ready?"

My brother was...

               

 

A child leads us the way 

to the daily doings of living

he depends on us

A carousel

one little ride at a time 

If you want to see a little video

of Gabriel riding this carousel I have

put it on my Facebook

just follow this link.

 

 

 

               

Distant View

 

I see you

I feel the grass under my feet  and

 the sound of the leaves as the wind blows through them

you are not far away 

unless I try to hold you.

 

I believed I could go home whenever I wanted

that distance never felt faraway

until now with covid

I cannot go home.

 

But...

               

 

softly evening comes

the sky grows dark

darker

the moon rises

with stars blooming like flowers

in an empty field.

 

 

Burning brightly

constantly changing

yet to the naked eye 

they remain the same

 

down below in the silence,

in the stillness,

in the darkness...

the garden grows unafraid

...

               

 

 

 

               

 

There's a Finnish poem

that my friend Aija translated and sent to me:

 

"We call for him

but he doesn't turn around.

He's on his way to the forests of his childhood,

to the land of blue flowers and golden autumns

where the birds sing a different song."

 

Sirkka Turkka

 

               

 

(Photos of my Vavie Amaro with some of her 23 grandchildren

My brother Marty is standing by her side then and now)

 

life is one big full ride

with twists, turns, getting lost,

wild downhill rides

and some long straight boring roads.

 

Filled with every emotion often in the same day

silly things

how life continues...

              

 

My brother Marty (60) went home this morning

He was surrounded by love and felt your prayers.

His family, brothers and mother were by his side.

 

 

His suffering is over. A heavenly host of love is welcoming him.

.... such sorrow, sadness and peace .

 

 

 

 

 

And here are some photos...

              

 

 

Last night friends and neighbors gather

outside of my brother's home

and held a candlelight vigil.

Please if you can light a candle

for my brother

that his path will be flooded with light.

              

When I was a child I had an incredible imagination and with that came terrific nightmares.

Many nights I woke up panic-filled, wide-eyed, my heart beating loud enough that any robber in the house could hear.

I was frightened to the point of feeling paralyzed.

My peace of mind came when I would call out to my parents.

The evening pattern...

              

Repost 2011

 

My brother's names remind me of the four gospels.. well almost.

Marty, Mathew, Mark, and Zane.

Marty's middle name is John.

And Zane's middle name is Louis which starts with a "L" like Luke.

Not that it counts.

But it does to me.

 

 

 

My oldest brother Marty is in red.

 

 

...

              

a few weeks ago my mom asked her grandson George

if he could clean up and get running my dad’s Harley that hasn’t run since my dad died over 12 years ago.

my godchild takes after my dad he rides like the wind and has self taught skills in mechanics. 

my mom said she wanted to see the Harley go down the lane again before she died.

...

              

              

 

thank you Brad Montague on Instagram.

 

 

 

              

Ram Dass 

 

 

“we’re all just walking each other home”

 

 

thank you Donna for reminding me of Ram Dass

 

 

              

Miracles happen

but as we know they do not on command or desire

love is a daily living gracious miracle

And most of all healing

that does not die.

Thank you for your prayers 

the road ahead is soften by them.

 

 

 

 

              

on this path

where steps are hesitate to walk

where the heart leaves a trail

where tears water it

and prayers scatter like dandelion seeds

heavy before the light

—-

my brother is at his home

my family is with him

my spirit too.

 

 

 

 

              

 

Sacha is living in Seattle, has created a company with his friend Conrad 

check it out here

Godspeed on Instagram

Godspeed
PNW Camera Guys
You have the idea, we have the solution!
Gimbal - Drone - Vehicle
Editing - Color Grading - 3D prints

GODSPEEDCINE@GMAIL.COM

 

He is happy doing what he loves.

...

              

              

 

Violets.

The bravest little flower

dares to bloom before spring announces itself

Receives a white winter coat and a heavy tiara of raindrop diamonds, 

Blooming purple with a note of glee.

Here I am,

such a tender little flower

reminding me of faithfulness against the odds, courage with grace.

 

              

Amanda Gorman's 

     Full Inaugural Poem: 

 

The Hill We Climb:

When day comes, we ask ourselves, where can we find light in this never ending shade?

The loss we carry. A sea we must wade.

We braved the belly of the beast

We’ve learned that quiet isn't always peace, and the norms and notions of...

              

Thank you again and again for your prayers for my brother Marty. It has been one year, a very long difficult year for him.

my brother says thank you 

that he feels prayers upon him.

Let it be a new tide coming in.

 

 

              

 

I spoke to my brother today

a few words that said so much

solemnly

how does one live with suffering 

pain

a terminal illness

one that challenges 

every cell and thought

without end-

is it

faith

courage

or

because living has its grip

and wondering why is

exhausting

and doesn't give you a free ride.

----

Your...

              

France

We wear masks it is not political.

everyone six years of age and older must.

Not just in shops. Masks are worn the second before you step outside.

Children wear masks all day in school.

You must use hand sanitizer before going into any shop.

Some masks make my glasses fog up, if I take my glasses off I cannot see. Lesson learned:...

              

  

 

little by little

however we can

receiving and giving

big gulps

handfuls

whenever however

freely

i Gotta do it

make the step

stay focused on that love

absurd love

overdose

Without measure