I’m writing this from a hotel room in Surrey, where I am billeted for a few days on a training course. (hence the one single phone snap image (I’m tethered on 3G so no big uploads for me!)

It’s a pretty nice hotel, country house with a golf course, although the rooms could use a bit of renovation. Then I walk into the bathroom and see this.

Naturally, I bring a wash bag with me wherever I travel, particularly in the UK where there is no liquid restrictions. However, I wish I didn’t have to bring everything.

The worst I have ever seen is in an etap (now ibis budget), where the kit consisted of one small square of unfragranced, bargain basement soap. Then you get the premier Inn and travel lodge, where it is a liquid soap nailed to the wall in a dispenser.

But even if you pay a lot more, unless you get into fully premium territory, the stuff is still pretty crap.

Sure, you may get more products, body wash, conditioner etc. But the overall quality of hotel toiletries is (in my experience) rather poor.

So, I put it to you, my wonderful readers, what would make your hearts fill with delight upon opening the bathroom door?

And as a second question, which hotels have the best toiletries? My best experiences have been in Hilton and Westin hotels.

Anyway, to my ideal set of toiletries for a hotel.

On the sink, I want liquid soap. And hand lotion. Ideally from Molton Brown. Loads of places have them in the bathrooms in the communal areas, so just bolt a set to my wall!

Body wash? Something fresh, in a decent sized bottle. If you could bring back original source pineapple, I’ll book a week with you right now.

Shampoo and conditioner, separate! No two in ones, it’s bullshit. Little bottles of tresemme will do nicely.

Body lotion, light, non greasy and not too heavy on the fragrance.

Throw in a shower cap for kitsch value, cotton buds, cotton pads and we’re talking.

If you’re really pushing the boat out, I’d like three more things.

First, face wipes would be brilliant. They have their detractors, but in a hotel scenario they are a jack of all trades, so a mini pack would be lovely.

Secondly, a refreshing mist/toner. The kind that lush do. If you’ve travelled serious distance, being able to quickly freshen up with a light mist spray sounds awesome.

Finally, is it too hard to customise? If the hotel could look at the guest profile and customise the type and quantity of the toiletries, that would be epic. Imagine it. Doesn’t have to be overly special, but if I got to my room and saw a little pile of Dove men+care for me and a matching pile of Dove for Maria, that would make me feel like the hotel cares.

I’d love to hear which hotels have the best stuff, and what you would like to see on your next stay.

One last note. The company that sells the (awful) stuff in this hotel also offer lines from Clarins and Thierry Mugler. If only.

Much Love,
Lodz

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Is this Justice?

Hello there – a rare serious post from me today. I try to stay away from politics and hot-button issues in general on my blog as I see it as a platform to escape into fun things like stuff that smells nice and stuff that looks nice. However, the last few days has seen two big judicial decisions in the US that have really made my blood boil.

Yesterday (18/04/2013), a ‘Hacktivist’ by the name of Andrew Auernheimer, or ‘weev’, was sentenced to 41 months in prison, and ordered to pay $73,000 in damages to giant US telco, AT&T. Why you ask? On charges of hacking a server and leaking over 100,000 email addresses of ipads belonging to AT&T customers. However, weev did not hack into AT&T, he merely noticed a vulnerability on a publicly accessible address. By changing the numbers at the end of the URL, he was able to get the system to release the email address matching those numbers. This is a huge hole, and it took what amounts to a couple of hours work for any reasonably IT savvy person to create a script to get the system to dump this huge cache of emails. He offered it out to the media to make the public aware, and to AT&T to close the hole. And then the feds came knocking.

To put it in more tangible terms, weev may as well have walked on the street past AT&T’s offices, and seen a giant whiteboard through an open window. Upon walking around to the next window, he sees that written on it are the emails of every AT&T ipad customer. The federal government then takes him down for breaking and entering.

Prosecutors in the case OPENLY ADMITTED that they didn’t understand computers and how this kind of thing works. Hence, they have sent a guy down for more than three years for a crime they have no comprehension of. Weev is a giant douchebag, this is not under debate. However, this douchebag has been railroaded into a lengthy jail term by an establishment fearful of change and determined to reinforce the status quo and rights of corporations to be idiots. At the same time, there can be no mistake that the prosecution is sending a message out to all computer users. If you stumble upon some private data that can be accessed by a simple typo, you are committing an illegal act. Well. Fuck.

Second big decision came a few days earlier, where two young men were convicted of raping a girl who was drunk at a party. Both were sentenced to a minimum of twelve months in prison, with one given a further year for distributing an image of a nude minor (that’s sending around photos of the sixteen-year old he raped, btw). Firstly, let me deal with the first point. These men were sentenced to a minimum of twelve months for raping a girl. In the same country where sumbling upon an email address is worth 41. That makes violating a young girl, ruining her life and leaving an indelible psychological mark upon her, worth just over 29% as much as the pride of a phone network.

There are numerous issues in this case. The first is the complicity of others present at the party. While their evidence and testimony was vital in getting a conviction, the fact that not one stopped the act from happening speaks volumes. This is a very interesting psychological issue, but one I am not qualified to talk about, so I will stop at saying that there are some deep rooted issues in young male culture and sports culture that need to be rectified.

Another is the apologists. CNN, one of America’s most respected news networks has run mostly with the side of rapists, on how one ‘mistake’ has ruined a promising sports career, and having to sign the sex offenders’ register for life will leave a permanent stain upon them. Rapists have to live with consequences of raping a girl. MY HEART BLEEDS FOR THEM. Poor little mites, if only THEY HAD NOT RAPED A DEFENCELESS GIRL.

Now  I understand there is sometimes a bit of a grey area when it comes to rape allegations (though fwiw, these were watertight). And some idiots may be a little confused, pondering if maybe a girl who gets drunk at a party, maybe even dressed provocatively, is ‘asking for it’. To clear the fog of confusion, I have prepared below my ‘Is she asking for sex flowchart’.

Potential rapists, keep a copy of this in your wallet and refer to it any time sex is looking likely to happen.

That’s pretty much the most part of what I have to say on the issue. Spleen vented, anger slightly subsiding. The overriding theme of both cases is thus – if you don’t understand something, whether it’s computers, the clock on your VCR circa 1998 or even human physical relationships, DON’T RUIN SOMEONE’S LIFE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IGNORANT FUCKWIT.

This is the first time I’ve engaged full on rant mode, so I’d LOVE to hear your comments, either below or on Twitter, as to what you think on the subject. Debate around such issues is always good, and I would also like to hear whether you can make sense of my stream-of-consciousness writing .

If you did like this one, let me know. If you didn’t, don’t worry, normal service will be resumed over the next few days and I will be back to talking shite about stuff that smells nice. Levity is the soul of wit and all that. (I know that is wrong but when you’re 950 words into a blog post, you’ve no right to use the correct quote).

Much Love,

Lodz

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Another review from me and today I’m looking at a terrific moisturiser from Jack Black, whose Beard Lube I reviewed last time out, with slightly mixed feelings – will this stuff knock my socks off?

Double duty is, I assume, so called because it is both an effective moisturiser and an spf 20 sunscreen. Whilst here in sunless Salford, there is little risk of sunburn, we are assured that if you are going near any form of uv light, you should sunscreen up to avoid long term damage to your skin.

So far, it sounds pretty good, but it needs a good test. I’m pleased to report that the results are excellent. Consistency is good, neither too thick or too thin, And absorbs easily and quickly. A little goes a long way, though as it is spf, I would encourage using a bit more than is absolutely needed, to improve protection. Always a word of warning with my reviews of moisturisers, my skin has all the inherent moisturiser of the kalahari, so my face sucks up moisturiser like a sponge. Your mileage may vary.

The scent is that of generic face cream, A bit floral and a little aquatic, fading rapidly, so it won’t interfere with your fragrance. General moisturiser pro tip, apply your fragrance before moisturising then spritz a little after – this should help your fragrance to linger a little longer.

If you are looking for a day moisturiser, I would encourage you to consider this stuff. I will not be giving up my beloved h2o+ moisturiser in the evenings, but before I leave the house I will be making sure I’ve used this stuff, especially as the weather gets warmer. It has certainly pulled double duty for me, and I am much more impressed with this stuff than I was with the beard lube. Well done to Jack Black, who have created a surprisingly light SPF moisturiser that, so far, has been just the ticket for me. I will definitely be using the rest of this, especially as we head into March, though whether I will re-purchase is as yet undecided.

Jack Black double duty moisturiser is £28 for 98ml and is available from mankind, who provided this product for review

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