For those of us in the Sandwich Generation, caring for our aging parents, hospitalizations are often a part of this season of life. As as so many of us know, when you are in the hospital with your loved one, you stay very busy. Between doctors, nurses, therapists, aides, and the patient themselves, you are constantly "on" – answering questions, asking questions, helping the patient, etc. 

If you are part of a large family, or a large church, or both, you may also find yourself fielding quite a few calls and visitors, which can add even more stress to the whole situation, as well as take your attention away from the priority of your senior parent's health. Recently, I watched some dear friends handle this so gracefully and wanted to share some of their ideas with you.

Pick one or two friends or relatives (perhaps one friend for your group of friends and one relative for your family) you really trust to be the "communicators." They will be the ones you call with any and all updates. They, in turn, are to send out a daily update of what is happening, along with specific prayer requests and what the visiting options are for the day. On some days, our friends explained the patient was too sick or too busy prepping for surgery to have any guests. Other days, they said visitors were fine – but limited in time, number and only between 5 pm – 7 pm. And they did it with such grace and humor! 

If you are computer savvy and have a laptop with you, CaringBridge is a great way of communicating with family and friends easily and privately. It's free to set up an account and per their site, "CaringBridge provides free websites to anyone facing a significant health challenge." We have had a couple of friends use this site and it's been a big blessing. And actually, you don't even have to be the one to use it. Again, you could delegate this to one person. Call or text them updates one-two times a day, and they would then update your CaringBridge account. You would give out the contact information to all who ask, and they can check on the progress of the patient easily from their own computers.

For that matter, you could also quickly create a website on Blogspot.com or WordPress.com for free. I believe they both offer the option to keep the accounts totally private. It might be a bit more of a learning curve, so I would only do it if the illness was going to be a long-term one and you have quite a few people to keep updated. And, of course, there are also Facebook, Twitter, and Google+. 

The other side of the coin for all this high-tech updating is to be very cautious, whatever you use. Always be sure all your posts are in total private mode. And always do all of this with the patient's full permission. Also realize, this being the internet, is anything ever really private? You might post something on Facebook privately, a friend might spot it and repost it NOT privately, and then, you could have a bit of a problem. Granted, people talking could do the same thing. Though it probably wouldn't get to as many people as fast…

As you know, I love technology and the internet. But I also try to take good safety precautions in all that I do, and highly recommend you do the same. That being said, it has been quite nice this week to get email updates every day, with new things to pray for, along with great news every so often. Technology is definitely a blessing for all of us in the Sandwich Generation – especially when used cautiously and wisely. How about you and your family? Have you got more tips on health updates for loved ones in the hospital? We'd love to hear. 

Kaye

Time for Vacation Bible School for the Children and Grandchildren

It's that time of year! If you pop into just about any church or listen to most Christian radio stations, you'll be hearing about it. About what, you may ask? Vacation Bible School – or as it's more commonly known – VBS.  

My grandkids are already excitedly telling their great-grandma about the TWO great VBS programs our church is offering this summer – a month apart. Full of colorful crafts, exhilarating music, and plenty of running games, I know they'll have a great time. And even better. They'll be learning important spiritual truths and encouraging Bible memory verses. What a great way to spend part of their summer!

Time for Vacation Bible School for the Parents and GRANDPARENTS

And not just them. For the most part, no matter our age or our physical health, there is probably some place we boomers and senior grandparents can help. Whether it's teaching a class, preparing the snacks, or assiting with crafts, there are plenty of needs for us to provide for. Talk about a super way of leaving a sweet spiritual legacy of servanthood for our grandkids to see. Not to mention the fact that it's just plain FUN to run into a grandkid or maybe even teach one of their classes.

Even if we can't join in this year, perhaps due to Sandwich Generation health issues, we can often still make an important contribution by paying for those camps that charge, transporting our grandkids to and fro, and praying a LOT for them, their teachers and their fellow classmates – for strength, energy, and blessed spiritual growth. 

Many years, I have not been in town to help. Other times caregiving duties have kept me sidelined. This year, however, I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get to pitch in. And yes, I did warn the church and VBS staff that I am a multigenerational caregiver and could be called away on short notice. They were great about working with me and thrilled to have extra hands to help.

Time for Vacation Bible School IN the Strength of the Lord

And after all – we don't need to do it alone. In fact, we shouldn't! As the Bible reminds us in Ephesians, "Walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma…be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Ephesians 5:2 and 6:10  (And don't you love the picture above? My oldest grandson helped me come up with the cool special effects at iPiccy that we used in this – a fun precursor to our Vacation Bible School summer activities to come!)

So, if it's at all possible, I'd like to encourage us all – in AND out of the Sandwich Generation – to join in the summer fun of Vacation Bible School with our kids and grandkids. What uplifting joy for us all! 

P.S. Don't forget, there's plenty more encouraging Bible verses and ideas for the Sandwich Generation at Internet Cafe Devotions on this Word-Filled Wednesday and Teaching What is Good where you'll find the important reminder of how fleeting our time is with our kids and grandkids. It's so vital to make the most of the moments we have with them, isn't it.  

Kaye

Oh my! Talk about war news updates for boomers and seniors. Nope, not the war overseas. The one in our very own, Sandwich Generation, back yard!

At first, my senior mom loved seeing the cute bunnies and squirrels as she worked on her gardening activities. Then she noticed the squirrels were snitching the bulk of the bird feed AND had started munching on the roots of her beloved plants. So she bought sunflower seeds, corncobs and carrots to entice them away, along with suet for the birds to try to give each critter their own goodies. But the bunnies kept eating the leaves and the squirrels kept munching on the roots and she kept getting more and more frustrated.They've also ignored her small plastic snakes that worked so well last year. 

A friend recommended marigolds which seemed to discourage squirrels in her yard, perhaps due to the scent. So she asked me to pick some flats up for her. While there, we looked to see if there were any realistic rubber snakes for kids to buy that were bigger than last year's stock. Take a look at this giant inflatable snake my grandson and I found at Walmart. If nothing else, it makes for fun grandkid photos. Plus he wants three more snakes for his brothers and him for their bedroom! (I said no ).

She planted some of the flowers in the "Sunflower House" circle and laid the snake out in the middle of it. She put the rest of the marigolds around her patio plants. Lo and behold, the flowers and giant snake do seem to be helping (it's been about 4 days now).  

And what fun boomer, senior, and grandkid activities for our whole Sandwich Generation family! How about y'all? Are squirrels and rabbits giving you a hard time like Mary and us? Do you have any other great tips for us? We'd love to hear. By the by, a quick reminder that Sweet Shot Tuesday has moved, but is still just as much fun for all of us who enjoy showing off the photos from that fun and easy digital camera. And what a great story and idea Kent has for those grandparents involved in scouting or other group camping adventures with their grandkids! I'm also joining up with One Beautiful Thing as those marigolds of my mom put such a sweet smile on ALL our faces. 

P.S. Wondering about the Sunflower House? It's a fun project my senior mom and grandkids and I have enjoyed during spring and summer gardening activities for the last few years. Click here for one of the first articles when we had just discovered it. Also, here's a great book from Sharon Lovejoy all about it!  :) 

Kaye

Do the Sandwich Generation issues of life keep you so busy, you wish you had a secretary? I know that feeling well. And, believe it or not, I do have a secretary or two – kind of. I thought I'd introduce you to one.

Meet my workhorse – Ms. EVERNOTE. Yes, it's an app. What else would a geeky baby boomer grandma have for a secretary, right?

Evernote isn't just an app for the iPhone, though I do use it there. It also works on my Mac, my Windows netbook and, to quote their site, "Evernote works with nearly every computer, phone and mobile device out there." How's that for handy!

Evernote is a program that lets you write notes, paste in information, and it stores it all "up in the cloud." Thus, you can access the same information at any time and almost anywhere you are as long as you are online via the internet. So I can add my senior mom's prescription medication to my notebook for mom, then I can read it at the doctor's office – IF they have wifi or IF I have my 3g AND wifi cell phone.

For that matter, Evernote is free, but they also offer a paid version, which I use. I added that so I could search through most of the pdf files on my iPhone and have access to notebooks even when I am offline like on a plane. (I could have gotten to my senior mom's medication info faster at the doctor's that time, IF I had remembered to push the little button making them available offline. I had just set it up and forgot that little detail.)

What do I keep in Evernote? My brain! Here are just some of the specifics:

• Bible file – favorite comforting and encouraging Bible verses, Bible study notes and verses, along with Scriptures and and other words of encouragement and inspiration I spot to comfort me in future situations. (I always mark where those came from to be sure I don't inadvertently share someone else's work. Plus I can then make reference to it down to road if I need to.)
• School and babysitting info – educational ideas and resources for the grandkids as well as notes for what we've read or done so I know where I left off
• Recipes – favorite recipes so I have them no matter which grandkids' house I'm at
• User Manuals – It is so handy to have my netbook and other manuals here for troubleshooting when not at home. And oh my, I just realized it can even include their LEGOs manuals and instructions so I can show them to the grandboys even if I'm not at my desk and printer! YAY! 
• Blog – for fellow bloggers and writers, it's great for keeping article ideas, information we need to read, great resources, and a raft of educational materials I never have time to read through. Then they are handy to read while standing in line or waiting for a senior parent or grandkid at a doctor's appointment, etc.
• Schedules and information for my senior mom and my grandkids, as well as myself – like sports schedules, physical therapy, etc.
• TO DO LIST – this is the last AND probably the most important. I keep a running to do list of everything I have to do. As I need grocery items I add them to this. I try to remember to remove things completed but some things I leave on permanently. When the list gets too long, I copy the most pertinent items and start a new one, saving the old in my archives. Then, if I need to remember something from way back, I can easily search for it. This is so much better than the stickies and paper lists I used to make and lose all the time! Especially in this Sandwich Generation season of my life when things are a bit more chaotic than they used to be.

It took me a bit of time to get used to it, but it was well worth it. Now, I'd probably be lost without it, literally. Since I'd be back to those paper lists and losing them again!  How about you? Have you tried Evernote? What do you use it for, besides your Sandwich Generation issues? If not, and you want to try it, just click here.

Kaye

When my husband died, it was one of the most difficult times of my life. I remember receiving so many lovely sympathy cards and they were all such a blessing to me. One, in particular, stands out to me even though it's been over a decade.

It was a lovely Hallmark card with several comforting Bible verses on the front and inside. Words of encouragement and inspiration are such a sweet gift to us – but when those words come straight from Scripture, they are doubly blessed!

A few months later, when a dear friend passed away, I went looking for that same card and found it. I bought several and used all of them over the next couple of years. When I went to buy more, I found they had changed the comforting Scriptures but still had the same basic card and bought several, including the one on the bottom – above.

I still have a couple and hope to find more before I run out. But I have also now created my own list of comforting Bible verses that have been such a sweet blessing to me and those friends and family who I've shared them with. I've already shared several of them, one at a time, here at SandwichINK. 

Recently, a family friend has been dealing with major health issues and I sent him a list of some of these Scriptures to lift his spirits. Then a couple of my online friends wrote about sad news of their own and I wanted to share the verses with them as well. So I decided to put them altogether here, over the next couple of weeks, to encourage and bless us all:

I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage;  Yes, wait for the Lord.  Psalm 27:13-14

I love You, O Lord, my strength.The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,  My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge;  my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. Psalm 18:1-2

The Lord my God illumines my darkness. Psalm 18:28

And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

I have set the Lord continually before me; because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken..You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever. Psalm 16:8, 11

You, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the One who lifts my head.  Psalm 3:3

God is my helper; The Lord is the sustainer of my soul. Psalm 54:4

Through God we shall do valiantly, And it is He Who will tread down our adversaries. Psalm 60:12

He Himself has said, "I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you." Hebrews 13:5 

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

Such sweet words of encouragement and inspiration from the awesome Word of God! Such wonderful encouragement for all of us in the Sandwich Generation on this Spiritual Sunday! Be sure to check back next Sunday for more. 

Kaye

My senior mom and I had such a nice Mother's Day last weekend. Grandkid hugs, pink flowers, lovely cards, yummy Chinese food dinner and sweet gifts. Last week I wrote about the Mother's Day gifts I bought my senior mom. I'm happy to report they were a big hit! 

I was, indeed, able to find the hydrangeas and aren't they a gorgeous color! Perfect for Pink Saturday. She decided to repot them in a bigger pot but keep them on the porch instead of in the ground. Since she is in an on-going "battle" with a cute rabbbit and two cute squirrels, she didn't want to plant them and have them get eaten in less than a week. And if you look close, you can see the mesh net covering the lovely flowers. She can still enjoy them, but hopefully the squirrels can't get to them.

The squeezey stress balls came in quite handy at her dental appointment. Even the dental hygienist was quite impressed with how great her funny ball worked – keeping her calmer and more relaxed than normal.

My personal favorite has turned out to be the Zibra Open-It Rx 4-in-1 Tool, We both use it on our Claritan D12 and it is so handy. I can't speak, yet, for it's other opening skills. But when it comes to those foil wrapped pills that are so hard to open – especially for our aging parents – it's quite nice.

I just push the lid down on this pill bottle opener, poke a hole in the foil wrapper, push the lid back over the razor blade, and then I can open the pill the rest of the way so much easier! No more broken nails and hurt fingers. This is one Mother's Day gift she was glad to share with me and I'm thrilled as well.

How about you? Did the Sandwich Generation issues of life give you a chance to do much for Mother's Day? Did you have a nice one? I do hope so and would love to hear about it. In the meantime, have a delightful, and probably pretty warm, week! 

Kaye

Sports balls and grandboys go together well, don't they? Soccer balls, baseballs, tennis balls, and my favorite (coz they are so easy to throw, even with arthritis AND they don't usually hurt if they hit me ) – big plastic toy balls. My grandkids and I use these in a variety of ways – from ball tag to swing/kick ball. Our latest discovery is really a re-discovery for this baby boomer granddma. Four Square (though sometimes for us it's three or two square).

Four Square was one of my favorite games at recess! How about you? And it turns out, it's still quite fun for me. As I tell my grandsons, it's similar to playing tennis only with your hands and not a racket. 

But one thing my baby boomer brain is fuzzy on is the rules of the game. So I went hunting and oh, my – it's a lot more convoluted than I remembered! I'm guessing each generation has added their own little "flair" to the game!

I did find one Four Square site, Wiki-How, that had some fairly simple directions that would work well for my grandkids and I thought it might help you as well. 

The reality is, we can play it any way we want, as long as we all agree and it definitely helps to have some basic rules. Some of the new ideas I learned and liked today included:

• Each square has a name – Ace, King, Queen, Jack. Ace rules and gets to make any important decisions like changing a rule. Jack is where you go when you get out and everyone moves up. 
• It's OK for the ball to not bounce in the square.
• We decided it just has to stay inside the box – no touching lines or the person is out UNLESS the next person plays it, then it is OK.

They were OK with these rules and we enjoyed playing for awhile. Then we headed to the swing where there was more shade and played kickball on the swings. 

As I said, in our Sandwich Generation family, we do love to play a wide variety of ball games. How about yours? What's your favorite? And did you know, there is an annual world four square championship every winter in Maine! Hmmmm, could be a fun goal for some grandparents and grandkids. What do you think?  And…

Kaye

Forms, forms, forms. Seems the older we get, and the more we deal with the various Sandwich Generation issues, the more they multiply! They can be worse than rabbits sometimes, can't they! Just this week, I had to fill out forms for school and homeschool, doctors and pharmacy, Vacation Bible School, and MORE! 

A couple of good things did come out of all this including some reminders for me to share with you. It is so vital for all of us who are caring for our elderly parents to realize that EVEN if YOU are the one who signed your aging parents up for their medicare, prescription, or other medical insurance, the companies are NOT allowed to talk to you without written permission, due to the HIPAA law. 

I was reminded of this when I took a prescription into our pharmacy for my senior mom. Due to a glitch of some kind, it was denied and the pharmacist thought we didn't even have that insurance anymore. I immediately called the company, but because we had not filled out their HIPAA form, giving them permission to talk to me, they could not discuss any of the situation with me. And since my mom was at home, I would have had to drive home, call them there for her to verbally give permission, then drive back to deal with the problem. Fortunately, they COULD talk to the pharmacist. He got on the line, they had him retry it, and it turned out to be some kind of internet glitch and the second time it went through well. 

Three important lessons for all of us in the Sandwich Generation – as this can impact our grandkids' medical needs as well as our senior parents:

1. If the pharmacy sends in the request for medication approval and it gets denied but you are sure it should be covered, have them run it through one more time to be sure.
2. When you sign an elderly parent up for insurance of any kind, immediately request they send a form out that will allow them to talk to you – fill it out – and send it back ASAP. Otherwise, you will probably forget and kick yourself when it causes you massive headaches later! 
3. If you have NOT filled out that form OR they can't find a record that you did (don't laugh – that's happened to us too!), see if they are allowed to talk to one of the staff people helping you. In this case, they were allowed to talk to the pharmacist and if it had been more than a technical glitch, hopefully he could have helped us all get it straightened out.

Once again, "be prepared" is a vital motto for all of us in the Sandwich Generation – not to mention, be flexible! Have you run into this problem before? Got more tips for us? We'd love to hear. And…

Kaye

It's been SUCH a WEEK! A week full of joy and a week full of sorrow. A week of health and a week with a bit of the tummy bug among some of my Sandwich Generation family. A week of feeling positive and a week of feeling down. As I write this, I have to smile, because that probably describes just about every week, doesn't it. Only this one seems to have been in technicolor. 

I was praying about what heavenly verse to choose as I drove home from babysitting grandchildren. I had just called my senior mom to see how she was feeling since she has continued to feel just a bit under the weather. And then I remembered a question from one of my grandkids about whether we will understand God when we are in heaven. And as I thought about his question, and about all that is going on – some of which I confess, I don't understand – I remembered what I told my grandson. It definitely encouraged me and I pray it will you as well.

When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. 1 Corinthians 13:11-12

It's true. We do NOT always understand what is going on down on this old earth. But someday. SOME GLORIOUS DAY. We WILL understand! And until then, we can cling to Him, and to the wonderful promises of God in the Bible like these, which have been extra close to my heart this week:

• Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6
• We know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28
• With those as a foundation, we are also able to read and obey 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, "Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 

NOT because we are perfect. BUT because HE is perfect! And HE has made these promises. And HE NEVER lets us down.

Just typing this, I feel better. I pray that as you read this, you feel better as well. AND that we can truly know and share this blessing and joy with our loved ones, including our aging parents who may be joining Him soon, and our grandchildren. What a wonderful way of leaving a spiritual legacy of joy, and comfort, and love!

For more sweet and comforting Bible verses and words of encouragement, do visit Word-Filled Wednesday, Women Living Well, and Teaching What is Good. Blessings to you this week IN HIM.

Kaye

Today is Senior Citizens Day. A perfect day to shine the spotlight on my senior mom along with her gardening and bird activities with her great-grandchildren. 

Both of these hobbies are so great for our aging parents – physically, mentally, and emotionally. And both are so rewarding – leading to lovely smiles and, often, gales of laughter. You should see my mom and grandkids howl when the squirrel jumps on the bird feeder rope and swings around and around and around. One of these days, I hope to catch a shot of it, but so far…

The grandboys and great-grandma have had the best time planting several sunflowers, some in pots and some in the Sunflower House area. The flowers are growing nicely and we're looking forward to what something a bit different from the last two Sunflower Houses in 2011 and 2012.

If you read Saturday's post, Need Last Minute Mothers Day Ideas for Your Senior Moms, you know I was trying to find the time in the midst of all the Sandwich Generation issues swirling around me to pick up a pot of the lovely hydrangeas my senior mom had been eying recently. SUCCESS! And aren't they gorgeous. There are several massive blooms like this all over it. She has repotted it and added it to her "raised garden

Happy Senior Citizens Day to all of us boomers and seniors – in AND out of the Sandwich Generation. Also, big changes are happening at Sweet Shot Tuesday AND Sweet Shot Tuesday 101 for us to check out. And…

Kaye