While I have been on this slow, arduous mission to be my healthiest self, I’ve had some setbacks.  I stopped breastfeeding, and immediately gained 8 pounds, for example.  But I want to be stronger and have more energy and avoid diabetes, so back on the wagon I go.

Plus, my friend Lauren, whose second child is only a month older than Minnie, posted a photo of herself in a bikini on Instagram.  I immediately texted her with TELL ME HOW, Lauren.  Tell me right now.  And instead of some magic formula I could buy by selling my pancreas on the Black Market, she attributed her success to eating healthy and working out.

Oh yeah, that.  :)

I’ve permanently broken up with the gym, and am only working out at home.  I called up my friend Jay and asked him to come try out the Soldier of Steel™ workout with me.  This was developed by the Hollywood fitness trainer  (Mark Twight) that whipped all the actors into shape for their roles in Man of Steel™ (which I’ve not yet seen, have you?).

Here’s their video teaser, dramatic music ahead:

Here’s one workout from the downloadable PDF:

We Vine’d each move so you can check them out here.  And by “we” I mean I held the phone while Jay did each move.  I would have Vine’d my own moves, but I need a few more days of practicing my deck squat before I can let anyone else see it.  Ahem.

Note: I went to my midwife and discovered that I have a diastasis, which can occur after childbirth.  So instead of sit-ups, I substitute planks instead.  Check with your doctor, though, because I am totally not qualified to tell you what to do.  :)

You can download the one-month training routine here. It’s free.  :)  You can also learn how Mark Twight fairy godmothered Henry Cavill into the Man of Steel™.  If you have a fitness question for Mark Twight, he’ll be answering questions under the @NationalGuard Twitter handle on Thursday, June 20th, from 3pm – 4pm EST at #TwightTakeover.

Let me know if you try it out.  This is, admittedly, the hardest workout I’ve ever done, but I know a lot of you are Crossfitters, so this might be the perfect amount of ‘challenge’ for you.  :)

The post Sweating with Henry Cavill. Sort of. appeared first on NEON FRESH.

Last month I posed this question to you: Whose brand’s products do you refuse to buy or which establishments do you refuse to patronize, and why?  The responses were many and varied and passionate!

So let me ask the opposite: Which brand or company will always have your undying devotion?

“Hi.  I love you.”

I have a few.  Aside from some great non-profits + Etsy shops that I love to support, there’s one actual people-are-rolling-in-dough-here company (there are a few, but here’s a great example) that I love simply because they have incredible customer service.  I’ve experienced enough terrible customer service to value it more than price.  Zappos (with whom I’m not affiliated in any way) has incredible customer service, free next business day shipping for their VIP members (which costs nothing), and free returns.

So, it’s 10:17 AM now, and if I purchased a pair of shoes or a shirt or something else off Zappos, it would get here tomorrow.  If I had Sophie try on the shoes and realized they were too small, I’d stick them back in the box, print out the return label, and just hand it to the UPS guy behind the counter.  (I have a mailbox in a UPS store, so this is NBD for me.  I have no idea if the UPS guys that come to your door will take them.  If anyone wants to weigh in on that, please do.)

If I need to talk someone about an issue, I hit up the live chat box where the rep is incredibly friendly and extremely helpful.  The prices aren’t the lowest in the world, but they do run great sales, and the convenience and customer service makes them a win in my book.

Okay, your turn!  Who has your heart + your wallet?

The post Which Brands Do You Love? appeared first on NEON FRESH.

“Mommy, do you remember what it was like before there were cars?”

I was driving the babe-mobile, so I glanced up at the rearview mirror and looked into Remmy’s sweet, cherubic face.

“Remmy, I was born in the 80s.”

“……”

“Remmy, the entire cast of Saved by the Bell is older than I am.”

“…..”

“Remmy, that includes The New Class, although no one really ever watched it.”

“You’re also old enough to remember when Taco Bell served Choco Tacos.”  (Just kidding, she didn’t say that.)

“Honey, I wasn’t around before there were cars.  Cars were invented a really long time ago.”

“Oh!”

We’ve been regularly collecting and reading the Little House on the Prairie books (the origin of Remmy’s question) for preschoolers (I think they’re called My First Little House books).  I’m thrilled, because those books were my absolute favorite growing up, trumping even The Boxcar Children and the Babysitters’ Club, but then Remmy and Sophie started calling me and Jack “Ma” and “Pa.”

At first it was kind of cute because they were really getting into it, but now it’s like… please stop.  ”I can’t be Ma.  Please stop calling your little sister ‘Baby Carrie.’  Her name is Minnie and I don’t want her to get confused, and no one named their kid Carrie after that movie came out in the 70s, WHICH, Remmy, is also older than me.”

If your name is Carrie, and you were born after 1976, I apologize for my error.

I imagine Remmy having this same conversation when she’s all grown-up.

“383,” she’ll say.  Because in the future, babies will have number names… I remember the look of shock on my mother’s face when we told her we would be naming our not yet born baby girl “Remmy.”

“How about Hannah instead?  Hannah is a nice name.”

Remmy will be standing in the kitchen with her daughter, 383.  (“There are like three other girls in her class named 383, ugh.  I swear I liked it wayyyy before it was popular.”)  “383, honey, I’m not that old.  Facebook is older than I am.  iPhones are older than I am.”

383 will have no idea what these ancient artifacts known as Facebook and iPhones are, so she’ll fire up her jetpack and fly off to school, leaving Remmy at the front door, pondering.  She’ll call me to lament.

And I’ll be sitting on my pet dinosaur, wearing, like, a Jansport backpack and a scrunchie in my hair, playing Oregon Trail on my laptop, laughing hysterically.  ”lol, honey.”

The post BRB, Riding Bareback on a Dinosaur appeared first on NEON FRESH.

If you’re new here (hello!), This is How I Feel happens on Fridays, reflecting my deep, deep love of GIFs and dumb captions.

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When I’m shopping online and I’m asking Google for a free ship code.

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When I pull clothes fresh out of the dryer and then toss them all on the bed.

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When I see a friend on Facebook post that they just got home from the hospital after having their new baby.

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When I tuck all three girls in at 7pm, and no one makes a peep.  BOOM.

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When I’m at Sephora and it’s time to leave.

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Want more?  Click here for Vol.1, Vol. 2, Vol. 3, Vol. 4., Vol. 5., Vol. 6, Vol. 7, Vol. 8, Vol. 9, Vol. 10, and Vol. 11.

The post This is How I Feel, Volume 12 appeared first on NEON FRESH.

I like to use polite language.  I don’t ever want to offend people when I’m out in public shopping for groceries or baby clothes or contraband or whatever.  I don’t crack jokes and reference hip hop culture with Trudy at the bank.

But Jack and I are sort of past all of that with each other.  Not that we sit around and crush beer cans against our foreheads and curse up a storm, but we joke around pretty regularly.  I play pranks on him often.  At my funeral, I don’t think he’ll say, “Roo was incredibly boring.”  A mediocre cook, yes.  Terrible at folding fitted sheets, sure.

Anyway, he was working and I had a huge list of things to do while the two older girls were in school.  It was a super hot day.  I was running errands, moving boxes, and I spent a solid hour cleaning out and vacuuming the van.  I had to call Jack at work to ask him a question, and he could tell that I sounded pretty breathless over the phone.

“Are you okay?”

(wheeze) “Yeah, I’m fine, I’m just sweating my balls off.” (wheeze)

“Let me take you off speaker phone.”

The post Eyy Trudy, What’s Good, Girl? appeared first on NEON FRESH.

In a gloriously perfect world, I’d wake up at 5:00am every day and head to the gym where a trainer would walk me through the weights section and then I’d do some cardio, get a smoothie, drive home, shower, blow out my hair, and start my day looking like this:  :D :D :) :D ****I AM SUNSHINE!****

Also in that world, I’d vacuum every day and the laundry hamper would always be empty.  I wouldn’t miss an entire strip of my leg shaving in the shower, I’d always get carded, and all of throw pillows would remain in their designated spots on the couch.  What do you mean you want to use them???  Just kidding, take a nap, it’s cool.

I live in an imperfect and yet still glorious world, but I’m learning that I need to strive for progress and not perfection.  I used to be really weighed down and trapped by perfectionism (I wrote a whole post about it here), but I think I’m past that.

I do get really excited when I find tools that help me reach my goals.  Makeup remover wipes?  God bless ‘em.  The Ergo carrier?  I would like to kiss the inventor, but not like in a weird way.  Earplugs, earbuds, and neat apps?  Yessss, come to me, my children.

FitnessGlo is one of those things.  It’s a website (check it here) that has a variety of workouts/classes.  They’re super effective, yet also designed to be time-saving so you can get your workout done and move on with your life.

You can pick and choose the classes based on:
- type (want cardio? stretch? strength? HIIT? etc etc etc so many omg so many)
- duration (from 5 minutes !!!!!! to 45 minutes)
- level (from really early beginner to the most advanced Schwarzenegger out there)

Here’s what I like about FitnessGlo:

1) Convenience.  All you need is the internet to make this happen.  If you have a Roku, you can use that, too.  This means I can workout in my living room, in my office, in a hotel room if I’m traveling, or in the middle of a diner (they… might kick you out).  If my day was crazy, I can tuck the girls in and knock out a quick 15 minute work out.  15, 10, 5 minutes is better than nothing, y’all.

2) PRIVACY.  I cannot tell you how many gyms I’ve joined where the group fitness walls are glass so all of the people on the treadmills and in the weight room can watch the back of me sweat and bend in strange, strange ways.

3) Personalization.  I have a treadmill, and I like to run on it, but I realize I’m missing out on some good strength training.  Sometimes I’ll warm up, do a quick ten minute upper body sesh, and then head downstairs to hit up a treadmill.  I can create a playlist so I can end each workout with some stretching (I literally cannot touch my toes).  There’s also a great balance tracker that lets you know if you are maintaining balance across strength, cardio, and stretch each week.

And once I’ve become familiar with the instructions to a workout, I can mute it and get down to this jam instead:

Get at me, 1998.

Many of the workouts don’t need any equipment, but you can pick up a set of inexpensive weights or kettlebells to get in on some of the more advanced workouts.  Ah-nold voice: I’M GOING TO PUMP {{clap}} YOU UP.

At $12/month, it’s a really affordable way to invest in my health.  FitnessGlo offers a free 15 day trial, so you can see if you like it (cancel anytime).

I’m also giving away a 90 day Fitness Glo membership.  You can enter below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Disclosure: This post has been sponsored by Fitness Glo.

(Original photo by pete451f)

The post Sometimes I Wear Pajama Shorts to My Gym appeared first on NEON FRESH.

Last month I told you guys about how Jack and I have very different shopping habits.  He likes to buy things that are super cheap, and I prefer to pick a couple of high quality products and just have a few.  For example, Jack has way more clothes than I do, but I’d guess that our wardrobes cost the same amount of money.  I listed a couple of ‘cheap thrills’ I’ve found that work amazingly, despite their low costs.

Today I’m venturing to the other end of that scale with a few products that are on the pricey side, but are absolutely worth the cost.

1) Bose SIE2i sport headphones.  These were sent to me to review, and I was really looking forward to trying them out.  I remember back in the 90s that my dad shelled out major $$$ for a Bose stereo system (I get my money habits from him… quality over quantity, boo), and the sound was incredible.  I’ve been using $20 earbuds, and these bad boys are $150.

The sound is incredible, especially when I’m listening to Crunk Jamz.  I will tell you this: I use these way more for NOT working out than I do for actually working out.  It comes with an armband to hold your phone, and I put these in when it’s “nighttime routine time” and anytime I have a work call.  The mic is fantastic, so I can type notes while I talk.  Jack loves them too, and even his stingy frugal self thinks they’re worth every penny.

2) Keen sandals for the kiddies.  It pains me to spend a ton of money on sandals, since they don’t get a lot of wear time and kids’ feet grow really fast.  The alternatives, like cheapy flip flops, don’t provide any support, so I shell out the money ($50, but you can find them on sale) for Keen sandals.  They’re “sneaker-like” so they can play rough in them.  I toss them in the washer and dryer, and they hold up great.  At the end of each season, I wash them and box them up for the next little girl.

3) LUSH Revive + Balance hair moisturizer.  At $23 for 3.5 ounces, it’s definitely more expensive than drugstore hair products.  I also don’t have a LUSH store close by to me, so I shell out for shipping as well.  However, this is holy grail hair stuff for me, y’all.  My hair is really thick, coarse, and prone to getting dry.  I also heat style it once or twice a week.  My hair should look like straw on a regular basis, but this keeps it manageable.

How about you?  Any expensive products that you absolutely swear by?

The post Pricey Products Worth Every Penny appeared first on NEON FRESH.

I am a huge advocate of texting and internetting.  I know we get criticized for it, brothers and sisters, but I do believe there is much good in technological advances, all of the bad stuff aside.  If I wanted to chat with a friend about something, a phone call would last about 30 seconds before either her children or mine were in need of something.  The text message is a gift to parents, I think.  We can all respond at our leisure, and no one has to get put on hold (kids or friends).  Perfect.

Except when you type something incorrectly and then you ruin lives.  THANKS A LOT, TECHNOLOGY.

Text, via phone or email or elsewhere, doesn’t have tone, gestures, or facial expressions attached to it.  Thank God for Emojis, man.  It’s gotten me out of a harrowing experience or two, just by using the Emoji of the ghost making the whassupppp face.

I had to text someone about something work-related, and asked if she could send over an email we had previously discussed.  Unfortunately, the ? and the ! are really close together.

“Could you send over that email intro?” became “Could you send over that email intro!” which made me look impatient and exasperated and pretty tool-y.

I really mean this. (?)

But I’m doing this. (!)

Not including a smiley-faced Emoji.

Saying “Thank you.” instead of “Thank you!”

“One time I accidentally sexted my stepmom instead of my wife.” – one of the NEON FRESH web guys
“I was supposed to have a meeting with my boss, but he texted me that he’d find me later.  Except he used a different four letter f-word.  It was bad.” – name withheld, naturally

What texting crimes have you committed?

The post When Technology Backfires appeared first on NEON FRESH.

MMMskk MMMskk MMMskk MMMskk, it’s This is How I Feel Friday, y’all.

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Watching an internet fight go down.

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When I get home and see a package from Amazon on my front porch.

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When nothing in the kitchen looks appealing, but I’m soooooo hungry.

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When I’m at a restaurant, and the woman at the table next to mine is talking loudly on her cell phone.

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When I’m watching some embarrassing romantic comedy and Jack walks into the room.

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Want more?  Click here for the previous installments: Vol.1, Vol. 2, Vol. 3, Vol. 4., Vol. 5., Vol. 6, Vol. 7, Vol. 8, Vol. 9, and Vol. 10.

Aaaand click here for the next one —> This is How I Feel, Volume 12

The post This is How I Feel, Volume 11 appeared first on NEON FRESH.

When I visit a local adult beverage purveyor – a package store/liquor store/etc – I’m ready for the usual liquor store procedure.  I’ll place a bottle or two of wine on the counter, and the cashier will ask for my ID.  I’ll smile, reach into my handbag, take out my wallet, pull out my license, and watch them check it carefully.  I’ll put the license back in my wallet, pay, and walk out,  slightly smug.  Ever so slightly.

The other day, Jack asked me to pick up a bottle of red for some sauce he was making.  Strolled into the package store, picked out a bottle of wine, placed it on the counter, and got ready for the procedure.  BUT, instead of asking me for ID, the cashier told me the total.  Hm?  Say what now?

UHHHH…. BRB.

The post You Must Be 21 — We Card appeared first on NEON FRESH.