This is a topic my 8yr old son and I argue over frequently.  As recent as yesterday!  The rule in our home is when you get get home from school, you get a snack and then get right on the homework.  As soon as homework is completed and checked then he can do whatever he wants to do-except watch TV! There is no TV during the week.  I know, he says  I’m no fun and “everybody else watches TV” and “everybody else does this” and “they don’t have to do that” etc.  What can I say,  I just find when there is no TV there is much more time to engage with the family, talk and do so much more.

So back to the topic of creating a space that is conducive for homework and study.  My son wants to do his homework downstairs at the kitchen island.  That is innocent enough but it just doesn’t work, far too many distractions.  During homework time I am usually cooking dinner, his 21month old brother is  bouncing off the walls and it is so easy to engage in conversation and play with us, it gets him off track completing his assignments.  I find homework that should take 30-60mins ends up taking hours!  CRAZY!  By the time he has competed the homework it’s almost bed time.  Then the mad nighttime rush sets in.  Rush to eat dinner, rush to bathe and get ready for bed, and before you know it it’s 9pm and he’s late for bed.

So we did get a desk for his room and he is to do his homework in his room.  That is what our arguments are over.  He doesn’t want to to go to his room to do homework.  He wants to be with us.  I explain all the great benefits of the room situation and being able to have fun sooner, but he is having a really hard time with that.  This is definitely a work in progress.

To that end I came across this article Creating a Good environment for studying at home and thought I ‘d share with you.

I’ll leave you with this excerpt from the article: “The study environment needs to harness the power of habits. We want students to think about the concepts they are learning, but we don’t want the environment to suggest other actions that will get in the way of studying…The advantage of promoting these behaviors is that after a while the habit system kicks in. Eventually, sitting in a consistently structured environment free of distracting technology is simply how studying gets done — now and for life.”

What do your study area look like?

Photo attribition:pjinomaha

This is a  Guest post

Photo: Alan Cleaver

I don’t know about your house in the mornings, but mine is just  MADNESS!!  Getting my son out the door to catch the school bus, is the most stressful hour of my entire day.   Madness and chaos with me trying to get breakfast and lunch done, while orchestrating his showering, dressing, making his bed and getting downstairs to eat.  It dawned on me one day that I was the only one “killing up myself!”   My son is completely oblivious to my yells and screams to “hurry up, nuh”, ” focus” “why yu so slouchy?”  There is just no urgency.  But then I figured it out.  There is no urgency because he knowsthat if he misses the bus, I will just take him to school.  Duh!  Why would there be urgency?  There are no real consequences.

So I finally decided to share this burden of the morning routine, no not with my husband, but with my son himself.  Brilliant!  If he missed the bus, he would be late for school because I would take him late.  I had a hard time with this, because getting to school late  is a reflection of the parent not really the child.  I gave that guilt up and proceeded with my plan.

I explained to him that he knew all his little responsibilities for the morning routine and I was not going to be following him up and shouting.  He was old enough to dress himself, make his bed, eat breakfast and be ready without me having to shout the entire morning.  So true to form, he takes his own time, misses the bus and I have to take him to school.  So I purposely waited so we would get there just after the bell rang.  Sent him to the office to get a late slip, I was so proud of myself and my little consequence lesson.  Later that day when I asked him about how being late was, he said “Mummy, it was just 2 minutes, the bell just rang!”  So he really didn’t feel this consequence-it was no big deal.   So no home run for me here.

Photo: manwithface

Another late morning and he misses the bus, is this kid ever going to learn?.  This morning now, I am smarter.  I explain that he is now on my time and I will  take him to school when I finish doing what I usually do after he leaves.  I washed up the morning plates, got a little news on the TV, then took a shower!  The guilt was killing me.  Taking my child to school 30 minutes late!  Oh my, that was just awful, but I had to stick to my guns.  How would he ever learn the real consequence?  Again a late slip from the office.

I believe there has to be a level of pain, to change  behaviour (not physical of course).  It is a work in progress, but it’s a much better situation to have him watching the clock and telling me to hurry up, than the yelling I used to do!  You see, the thought of having to get that late slip is just the pain he needs to change his behaviour!

Photo: Dave Stokes

I love the idea of him owning whether he gets to school on time.  If he is late, no one to blame but himself.

What do you think about that?  How do you put some “teeth” in your consequences?  Share your thoughts in the comments below.

I had the awesome privilege of attending Oprah’s Lifeclass in Toronto…(me and 8500 others!)  Oprah and her team of teachers, Iyanla Vanzant, Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra and Bishop T.D Jakes discussed Gratitude.  It was an amazing experience to be a part of all the madness, excitement, expectation and anticipation of an Oprah event!  I just want to share a few of my takeaways and more importantly a suggestion on nurturing Gratitude in children.

• I have always heard Oprah speak about  keeping a Gratitude journal.  She says everyday write down 5 things  you are grateful for.  If you’re thankful for what you have you’ll end up with more!
• Life will stop in different places along the way.  We need to be grateful for every stop and pay attention.
• Wherever there is appreciation there is duplication
• Gratitude is our response to the gift.  We have been given a gift by God (i.e. whatever  obstacle, hardship, disappointment etc. that comes our way is a gift.  Be grateful for the lesson of that experience.  As difficult as it may be at the time, find the teachable moments.

These concepts are somewhat abstract even for adults, so how do you nurture or teach Gratitude in/to children?

The “simple” answer is to have them give something away.  It can be a material item they love,  they can give of themselves, a skill, a talent, their time etc.  This would be especially important for children who are in difficult family/socio-economic situations who may struggle with finding anything to be grateful for.  Have them give of themselves.  Help a younger child develop a skill, volunteer, visit hospitalized children etc. We all have something to give!

How do you nurture Gratitude in your children and your life?  I would love to hear your ideas on Gratitude.  Please leave a comment below.

Photo attribution: vistamommy

Our children need protein in their diet so much so that their first food is protein rich breast milk. This is not a coincidence. Our fingernails, skin, hair, gum [holds teeth], eyes, movement, all use proteins to carry out their function. Protein is also needed to repair and replace worn out body cells, but more importantly for our little ones, it is needed to make new cells and tissues that is needed for rapid growth.

A child’s first year of life is marked by rapid growth, with birth weight tripling and birth length increasing by 50%. After the rapid growth of the first year, physical growth slows down considerably during the preschool and school years, until the pubertal growth spurt of adolescence.

Protein is essential for growth, development, and maintenance of the body; it also provides energy. Protein yields 4 kcal/gram (g). Food sources of protein include meat, fish, poultry, milk, cheese, yogurt, dried beans, peanut butter, nuts, and grain products. Animal proteins are called “high-quality” or “complete” because they contain all the essential amino acids in the proportions needed by humans. Vegetable proteins, with the exception of soybeans, are called “low-quality” or “incomplete” because they have low levels of one or more essential amino acids. A vegetable protein may be paired with another vegetable protein or with a small amount of animal protein to provide adequate amounts of all the essential amino acids.

For example,

• Black-eyed (gungo) peas ( complete) can be paired with rice (incomplete),
• Peanut butter (complete) with wheat bread (incomplete),
• Pasta (incomplete) with cheese (complete),
• Cereal (incomplete) with milk (complete)

As you can see, we may normally put these together without much thought, but it should be highlighted that we ought to ensure that our children are getting a good supply of protein.

Did you know?

Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails. If you notice you’re trimming your fingernails much more frequently than your toenails, you’re not just imagining it. The nails that get the most exposure and are used most frequently grow the fastest. On average, nails on both the toes and fingers grow about one tenth of an inch each month.

Is protein a consistent part of your children’s nutritional intake?  How do you incorporate protein into their diets?  Leave us a comment below.

Source:

• S. Domel Baxter “Nutrition for Healthy Children and Adolescents Ages 2 to 18 Years” Pg. 1,6.
• “100 facts about the Human Body”

Photo attribution: bgottsab

Read more from Tanya Lambert at her award winning blog, http://www.jamaicanfoodsavvy.com/, winner of Best Food Blog, Jamaica Blog awards 2011.

When your children do well in school, do you reward them?  With money, toys, gifts whatever?  Harmless enough, right?  They do a good job so they deserve a reward.  When you do well at work you are rewarded aren’t you?  With a bonus, a little extra perk etc. for a job well done.

This is a topic that I have thought about  a lot.  I always felt intuitively that rewarding children for grades sends the wrong message, but when challenged by my friends  I really didn’t have  a good reason as to why.

My 8 year old is quick and really challenges me to step up my (parenting) game.  When I told him we were going shopping, which he was not a fan of, he would tell me that I had to take him to the toy store.  So being the clever parent I am (finding his currency) I would tell him if he behaved while I did my stuff, he would get to go when I was finished.  That little “trick” created a monster for me to deal with going forward.  He equated everything good that he did, be it grades, behaviour etc. with some type of reward from me.  That just could not continue!

We had a little “meeting”, my son and myself  and talked about expectations.  His expectations of me as his mother and my expectations of him.  I explained that as a member of this family we expected him to behave when we went out, he was just supposed to.  Behaving isn’t something special or above and beyond.  I also expect him to do well in school.  He is supposed to do his homework, study for his little tests and get good grades.  He is just supposed to!  There is also nothing special about that.

So what’s the big deal?  I have seen more and more articles  lately speaking to studies that relate to this topic.  The fact that rewarding your children has them focused on the reward and not focusing  on the actions and skills the rewards were put in place to cultivate.  So instead of reinforcing the love of reading, or the love, excitement and drive of working hard to achieve their own success in school, they are focused purely on the reward, and not on the pure sense of fulfillment and satisfaction that comes with working hard to achieve their goals.

What I have started doing more of when he is successful, is celebrating and making a big deal of the actions he took to accomplish those goals.  We talk about the hard work and preparation that went into him accomplishing his success, and that he too should be proud of what he can accomplish. This route I think we are teaching them more.

What do you think?  This this approach is too harsh?  Do you reward your children for grades?  I would love to get your thoughts and comments below.

Photo attribution: 401K

We are sharing this PSA from Inscape Foundation about child abuse and the rights of the child for safety and security. Who or what is Inscape?

Therapy for all

Inscape Foundation offers therapy for everyone. They are the first and only foundation offering free therapy in the Caribbean! Their mission is to provide Individual therapy,Art, Drama and Music therapy to people living in inner city communities in Jamaica free of cost by trained therapists. They specialize in trauma and crisis response. They provide the resources for personal growth and transformation from the inside out. Inscape is one source of change rippling through our communities. Join the Movement to reclaim our Jamaica.

For information visit Inscape Foundation.

Check out the PSA:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vAJb0tuYb4&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I take my job as a parent seriously, as I am sure most of you do.  So, just think for a minute, what are we teaching our children?  What life lessons are they growing up with?  Who are we creating?  Who will they become as a result of the lessons learnt from us?  Here is a post from Heather Allard, The Mogul Mom, whom I respect greatly.   I am a regular reader of her website and fairly engaged in her content for “Moms running a business, raising a family and rocking both”.  She usually shares tips, ideas, resources etc. for women in business and with a family.

Her post today was a little different.  She spoke about the life lessons she learned from her parents.  Three powerful lessons: Never give up, Be the Wizard, No regrets! I was really inspired by this and wanted to share with you, my readers.  As I have said before, it’s really not about being the perfect parents with the smartest, most athletic children.  It is really more about our engagement as parents in our children’s development.  It’s about the lessons we teach, the morals we instill and by the behaviours we model.  All wrapped up in the love we show and share.

What are the life lessons in your family, and who are you creating to make our world a place we will be proud of?  Share your comments below.

Photo attribution: mikebaird

Thanks to Kellie Magnus and Jackmandora for our latest book giveaway!  We are thrilled to be giving away copies of the latest additions to Kellie’s children’s books.  Well known for her Little Lion series (one of my all time favourite children’s books), Kellie now has done a picture book, ” A Book for Baby”.  Her illustrator and talented poet, for the Little Lion series, Michael Robinson has joined her with his  picture book, “Trixie Triangle”.  Both books were developed for the BookStart pilot programme for the 0-3 age group and are the first board books ever published in Jamaica.

I asked Kellie what was her motivation for writing these baby picture books and here is what she had to say,  ”There’s tons of research indicating that kids who are read to early have a developmental advantage over children who are not.  One of our biggest educational problems in Jamaica is that children show up at school lacking emergent literacy skills. They’re not ready to learn to read because they haven’t been sufficiently exposed to books. That’s why the Min of Ed developed the BookStart programme — to encourage parents to read to their children from birth and to provide as many of them as possible with a free, age-appropriate book. As a Jamaican writer I was hell bent on making sure that the first book Jamaican children see is a Jamaican book! (There were no Jamaican baby books available when the Ministry first approached the book industry with the idea, so we developed them specifically for the project.) But we’re making them available at a low price so that parents across the country can have access to them.”

Both “A Book for Baby” and “Trixie Triangle” are beautifully done.  Sturdy/cardboard, colourful, engaging pictures of families dancing, singing, teaching shapes and colours and even better, there is the incorporation of Jamaican culture in the illustrations with the  Ackees and the Jamaican flag.

They are exactly what baby picture books should be.  Lots of pictures, little writing to encourage interactive storytelling and associations and sturdy.

They are available at all major bookstores and pharmacies island wide for about $J500.

Want to win your own copies?  See contest rules below

Contest Rules

1) Sign up for Kid ‘N’ Play JA’s newsletter on the home page of our website
2) In the comments section below, tell us why you want a copy of  “A book for baby and Trixie Triangle”
3) Fill out your name and email information correctly, so we can notify you if you win
4) Contest dates March 9th-21th 2012
5) Winner must respond to email notification within 5 days or prize will be awarded to another winner

*** Extra entries, Tweet or Facebook that you have entered the contest.  Leave a comment below for each one done.  Our Twitter handle is @kidnplayja***

It’s no secret, I am not a crafty Mom at all.  I can barely draw a stick man, but I have always encouraged my son with this love to create.  When he was younger (4-6) he enjoyed drawing and colouring and making all kinds of crafty things.  Now that he is 8 he is much more interested in constructing “buildings” and coming up with the latest inventions-even though a great mess is created during the process!  I am the Mom though always looking for fun ways for him to learn something new, exposing him to new ideas and experiences, and sneaking “education” somewhere in there.

I came across this neat Mom blog, which is quite crafty, but this entry I thought was brilliant and had to share.   She used brown paper bags to create puppets, that’s not the end of it.  It doesn’t end there, there is a huge literacy component here which I just love.  Here goes…

She tells her daughter they are going to create paper bag puppets.  The daughter has to come up with a story for these puppets, and then Mom asks questions, suggests twists and villains and extends the story line.  After they discuss the story, the child goes off to write the story.  Once the story is finished then they go to town creating all the characters with the brown bags with all the notions and embellishments, buttons, string, yarn, felt, paper anything you have around the house.  When you have the puppets then you can have a puppet show with the child retelling the story.

I just love this activity.  The writing component, the story telling aspect, the creativity in the story and in also creating the puppets and then again the dramatic flair with the puppet show!  I am sure we could have just as much fun with our sons create martians, football players or warriors as their puppets.

Here is the full story from Mom Labs.

Please let me know if you if you have done this and how it turned out with your children?  How do you squeeze “education” into a fun time activity?  Share your comments below.

One of our readers Thalia Green, had her son’s birthday party at the Zoo.  See her story of the fun they had at the Zoo.

Recently my son was celebrating his 4^th birthday.  The week before the party I decided to take him and his sisters to the Hope Zoo, having seen the mini- billboard on Oliver Road and ads in the Gleaner, so off we set to the Zoo. Upon reaching the Zoo my Son announces that he wants to have his party at the zoo. I’m thinking this is not possible, but let me ask if they do this anyway, really just to appease him. Guess what!! They do have areas inside the zoo that you can have a function.

Safari cake by Annette Chang

So the planning started. We had already decided on a Diego theme and the plan was to turn the backyard into a safari so the idea of having the party at the zoo came in really handy and fit perfectly into my theme. It was such a great time for all the kids, and adults alike as I had tons of activities planned for them and the zoo  also had activities planned. For the guided tour of the zoo, which was done at animal feeding time so they could see how the animals were fed, this was offered as part of the zoo package,  I gave all the children vests like Diego’s with rescue badges affixed, small orange knapsacks filled with telescopes, a pair of binoculars, magnifying glasses, compasses and a whistle with a light on it, and off they set on their adventure.

After the zoo tour the kids came back and we did an animal rescue, with the story line of Al Rascate!! like they do on Diego and I told each child that they had to rescue their lost animal. I hid small stuffed toys, each with a tag with each child’s name on it and the name of their lost animal and each child was told to only find their animal. Of course I didn’t hide the stuffed animals too far as the kids were only between ages 4 -6. This too was a big hit for the kids.

Then we played animal sounds, for which each child was given an animal mask and had to make  animal sounds. Then the children went to the petting zoo, which was closed to the general public for the hour we occupied it. The children got an opportunity to hold the baby alligator, the snake and to see the other animals up close and personal, and to watch them feed the lamb,  which was also great fun. After that the zoo did a skin and bones animal education with them allowing them to feel the skins of some of the animals that were there before like the lion and some snakes learn a little about the animals at the zoo.

Zebra cake by Annette Chang

The entire party was animal themed, I even got the cakes made like a safari for my son and the zebra print for my daughter (she turned one the week before his birthday). Overall all my little Diego’s and Isabelle animal rescuers had a great time and the zoo was the perfect venue and a different venue for a birthday party.

For thank you notes I gave each child a small plastic zoo animal and an official animal rescue certificate!

I am so pleased with what is being done to the Hope Zoo, and think that it is not only a great way to spend the day with the family but educational as well.