Last night, I had dinner with a long-time Get Rich Slowly reader. Amy is traveling the West Coast with her mother, and they’ve made their way to Portland after stopping at San Francisco, Yosemite, and Crater Lake.

Amy and I spent two hours chatting about her life and about mine. As we talked, we realized we have a lot in common. We’re both divorced, comfortable in our own skins, make decent livings, and have ample free time to explore the things we enjoy in life. Though we’re both content, we’ve each been trying to find a bit of direction.

“I feel lucky to have started my ADHD meds,” I told Amy. “They’ve allowed me to focus. And they’ve helped me rediscover my passion for writing. I love to write. I feel like that’s what I’m called to do. Over the past few weeks, it’s been awesome to throw myself back into my work. For instance, I spent five hours writing that short article about how to live a life you love, but it came out almost perfect. It’s exactly what I wanted. I love when that happens.”

Amy sighed. “I wish I knew what I wanted to do,” she said. “I haven’t found my passion. I like to read and I like to garden and I like to travel, but that’s not the same as liking to write. I love my job, but I’m not passionate about the work. I don’t feel called to do it. I wish I could figure out what I should be doing.”

I have this conversation over and over again with folks my age. People are dissatisfied. Maybe they’re content in their jobs, but they don’t find them fulfilling. They crave a greater sense of purpose, an alignment of work and values. We reach age forty, and we still don’t know what we want to be when we grow up.

“You know,” I said to Amy, “I think I have some resources that could help you as you’re thinking about what you want to do with your life. I’ll send them to you.”

The first resource is What Should I Do with My Life? by Po Bronson, which explores how people find meaning in life. The book features dozens of interviews and stories with people searching for a greater purpose. From what I gather — I haven’t read the book yet — Bronson poses more questions than he answers. Still, I think this book could provide fodder for Amy (and other folks) as she tries to figure out what her future holds.

The next resource I recommend is the work of George Kinder, who explores what he calls “life planning”, a more holistic approach to financial planning.

I’ve argued before that the road to wealth is paved with goals. Kinder doesn’t ask us to set goals; he asks us to examine our values, and to decide what’s important. To help clients discover the deeper values in their lives, Kinder poses three questions:

1. Imagine you’re financially secure, that you have enough money to take care of your needs, now and in the future. How would you live your life? Would you change anything?
2. Now imagine that you visit your doctor, who tells you that you have only 5-10 years to live. You won’t ever feel sick, but you’ll have no notice of the moment of your death. What will you do in the time you have remaining? Will you change your life and how will you do it? (Note that this question does not assume unlimited funds.)
3. Finally, imagine that your doctor shocks you with the news that you only have 24 hours to live. Ask yourself: What did you miss in life? Who did you not get to be? What did you not get to do?

Kinder says that answering the first question is easy. There are lots of things we’d do if money were no object. But as the questions progress, there’s a sort of funnel. They become more difficult to answer, and there are fewer possible responses. Life planning is all about answering the third question.

According to Kinder, the third question usually generates responses that follow five general themes:

• Family or relationships — 90% of the responses to the final question contain this topic.
• Authenticity or spirituality. Many responses involve leading a more meaningful life.
• Creativity. Surprisingly, a large number of respondents express a desire to do something creative: to write a science-fiction novel, or to play guitar like Eric Clapton.
• Giving back. Further down the list are themes about giving back to the community, about leaving a meaningful positive impact.
• A “sense of place”. A fifth common theme (though nowhere near as prominent as the top three) is a desire to have some connection with place: a desire to be in nature, to live someplace different, or to help the environment.

I’m reminded of Bronnie Ware’s article about the regrets of the dying. Ware spent many years working in palliative care, and she noted that at the end of their lives, people tended to express five common regrets:

• “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
• “I wish I didn’t work so hard.”
• “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”
• “I wish I’d stayed in touch with my friends.”
• “I wish I’d let myself be happier.”

So, readers, here’s a question for you: It’s great if you know your passion — mine is writing — but what if there’s nothing you feel called to do? What then? How do you find a calling? How do you know what you ought to do?

The post How Do You Find Your Passion? appeared first on More Than Money.

I’ve always been fascinated by the idea of extending human life. As a boy, my favorite characters in the Bible were those like Methuselah who lived for hundreds of years. (Noah, of ark fame, was reportedly 600 when he built his boat, and he lived for another 350 years after the flood!)

I’m also drawn to science-fiction novels that feature longevity as a subplot. For instance, in Kim Stanley Robinson’s Mars trilogy (which I mentioned a few days ago in another context), medical advances allow people to live for more than two hundred years. (For a decade, I’ve had an idea for a short story called “Herb Nelson’s Long Life”, which would be about a man who has been alive for centuries.)

Naturally, I’m not just interested in fictional accounts of longevity. I’m interested in the science behind it too. Recently, I found time to read The Blue Zones by Dan Buettner, a book that examines the lifestyles of five of the longest-lived populations on the planet. What attributes do these folks have in common?

The Blue Zones

I first read Buettner’s work in the pages of National Geographic. In November 2005, the magazine printed his article, “The Secrets to a Long Life“, which offers a taste of what’s contained in The Blue Zones. In the article, Buettner profiles populations in Sardinia, Italy; Okinawa, Japan; and Loma Linda, California. These are communities where people live long and stay happy.

Expanding his work to book length, he added two additional locations: the Nicoya Peninsula in Costa Rica and the Greek island of Ikaria.

In each of these five locations, people have long and healthy lives. They reach the age of 100 at rates significantly higher than average.

In The Blue Zones, Buettner shares stories from each of these locations, sharing how specific people have lived and thrived for ten decades. As he interviews people in each location, he tries to find common threads. What is that makes the people in Sardinia live so long? In Ikaria? Then, at the end of the book, Buettner draws from these five populations as a whole. What attributes do they share?

Long and Healthy Lives

After looking at these groups individually, Buettner makes nine broad generalizations about factors that seem to be related to longevity and well-being. Note, though, that correlations does not imply causality. These qualities are present in the communities he’s studied, but that doesn’t mean they’re actually the secrets to long life. (Though, of course, I’d like to think they are.)

Here are the recommendations from The Blue Zones:

• Be active. Those who live a long time are generally active people. They walk. They raise gardens. They have fun. If you struggle with this, Buettner suggests finding ways to force yourself to be active. He also recommends doing yoga twice a week.
• Cut calories. Many Eastern cultures have a practice in which they eat until they’re “80% full”. Buettner recommends cutting portion sizes through common tricks like using smaller serving dishes, making snacks a hassle, preparing smaller portions, eating more slowly, and eating early.
• Eat a plant-based diet. Eat two servings of vegetables with every meal. Limit meat intake. Avoid processed foods. Make fruits and vegetables the highlight of your diet. Stock up on nuts, and eat them every day.
• Drink red wine — in moderation. Sip it with your dinner, or institute a daily “happy hour” where you socialize with friends.
• Have a purpose. Take time to see the Big Picture. Craft a mission statement, and then find a partner to hold you accountable to it. Learn something new. Buettner points out that learning a musical instrument or studying a new language are two great ways to keep your brain sharp.
• Downshift. Reduce the stress in your life. Cut out the electronic noise. Arrive early to appointments. Meditate.
• Participate in a spiritual community. Buettner stresses the importance of spiritual communities, and encourages readers to open their minds, discard prejudices, and just go to a church service.
• Make family a priority. Live closer to your family. Own a smaller home, where people are forced to interact more. Establish rituals. Create a family shrine.
• Find the right tribe. Be likeable. Surround yourself with people who share your values. Identify your inner circle, the people you trust and support. Try to spend 30 minutes each day with these folks.

Here’s a Venn diagram (from Wikipedia) that summarizes Buettner’s findings from the three original Blue Zones. (I’d love to see a similar diagram that takes into account all five regions.)

Common attributes among Blue Zones

More than anything, Buettner writes, “Purpose and love are essential ingredients in all Blue Zone recipes for longevity.”

Conclusion

There’s no way a simple blog post can do justice to Buettner’s book. The Blue Zones is fascinating, at least for those of us interested in longevity. If you want more info, buy the book (or borrow it from the library, like I did). You can also visit the Blue Zones website, where you’ll find:

• Plant-centric recipes
• Checklists to push you toward some of the Blue Zones guidelines
• The Blue Zones Challenge for kids
• A life-span calculator (my life expectancy is 86.2 years)
• A happiness test (I scored an A-)

I’ll close this summary with a key piece of advice from The Blue Zones. “This information will do you no good,” Buettner writes, “unless you put it into practice.”

The post The Blue Zones: How to Live a Long and Healthy Life appeared first on More Than Money.

I like cats. My family owns a box factory. So it’s natural that I should share this awesome video of big cats in boxes:

It’s funny to see that lions and tigers (and other big cats) are just as dorky with boxes as your typical housecat…

The post Video: Big Cats Like Boxes Too! appeared first on More Than Money.

For a long time, I was unhappy. I was fat, broke, and miserable. Maybe I was depressed, I’m not sure. Whatever the case, I didn’t like my life, and I wanted something better. I waited and waited but nothing ever improved.

Eventually I hit bottom. I wasn’t willing to allow myself to sink any lower, so I decided to make some changes.

I started by taking control of my finances. I began to read about saving and investing. As I read, I put what I learned into practice. It didn’t happen overnight — in fact, it took years — but I paid off my credit cards and put money into savings. Today, I’m debt-free and have a substantial nest egg.

After putting my financial house in order, I decided to take control of my fitness. I began to read about exercise and nutrition. As I read, I put what I learned into practice. Again the changes happened slowly, but they did happen. Within a couple of years, I had lost fifty pounds and put on muscle. More importantly, I’d changed my eating habits and made exercise a part of my daily life.

Fitness is one of my daily priorities.

It’s been said that success breeds success. That was certainly true in my case. Each positive change I made helped me to understand that I could make other positive changes. I realized that nobody cares more about my life than I do. If I want to be happy, I need to be in charge of that happiness. I can’t wait for anyone (or anything) to bring it to me.

I am responsible for my own well-being. And you are responsible for yours.

As children, we’re conditioned that we need permission to do things. You need permission from your parents to leave the dinner table or to go outside and play. You need permission from your teacher to go to the bathroom.

Even as adults, we often feel we need permission. You need permission from your boss to leave work early. You need permission from your spouse to hang out with your friends instead of cleaning the bathroom.

Like many folks, I grew up with an external locus of control. I thought my fate was largely determined by the people and events around me. This wasn’t a conscious belief, but it was always there, underlying everything I felt and did. As a result, I waited for things to happen. I needed permission to take risks or to try new things.

That’s no longer the case.

After you’ve reclaimed your life, help others reclaim theirs…

I’ve spent the past ten years reclaiming my life. I’ve shifted to an internal locus of control. I’ve come to realize that I’m in charge of my own destiny, and that it’s my responsibility to live a life I love. This means that I need to:

• Avoid excuses.
• Ask for what I want.
• Own my decisions.
• React constructively to adversity.
• Collect (and take advantage of) opportunities.
• Let go of the things that no longer work.
• Ignore the opinion of others.
• Act — even when I’m afraid.

If you’re unhappy, nobody else is going to make things better for you. You have to make things better for yourself. Concentrate on the things you can control, and use that control to fix the other things that are broken. This will grant you even more control over your future well-being.

You live in a world of your own creation. You have the power of choice. You create your own certainty. Live your life as you want to live it, and do so without regret. Give yourself permission to do so.

The post How to Live a Life You Love appeared first on More Than Money.

On Friday, Kim and I had dinner with Jason and Kyra Bussanich. Jason is a chiropractor in Lake Oswego and his wife Kyra owns a popular gluten-free bakery. (Kyra also won an episode of Food Network’s “Cupcake Wars”.)

Over dinner, we touched briefly on the notion of a gift economy. Wikipedia has a great definition of this concept:

A gift economy is a mode of exchange where valuables are given without an explicit agreement for immediate or future rewards. In contrast to a barter economy or a market economy, social norms and custom govern gift exchange, rather than an explicit exchange of goods or services for money or some other commodity. Gift exchange is frequently “embedded” in political, kin, or religious institutions.

The next day, Kim and I joined Kyra and her mother to see the Dalai Lama speak at an environmental summit here in Portland. At one point, the moderator posed this question to the panelists: “On some level, the human experience is all about consumption. Life lives by consuming life. But how do we moderate our consumption to reasonable levels?” All of the answers seemed very similar:

• Oregon governor John Kitzhaber said the challenge is to build an economic system that is not built on the assumption of unlimited growth and unlimited consumption. He pointed out (as I often have) that beyond a certain level, increased income does not increase happiness. Kitzhaber also stressed the importance of social capital, the mutual goodwill we create when we interact with our friends and neighbors.
• Environmental activist David Suzuki said that because of the effects of the Great Depression, “The engine of our economy runs on consumption, and we don’t focus on the things that truly make us happy. We think of prosperity in a weird way. It’s not our things that make us wealthy — it’s our family and it’s our friends.” [For the record, studies show that health and the quality of personal relationships are the best predictors of personal happiness.]
• Andrea Durbin, executive director of the Oregon Environmental Council, joined the chorus. “We need to make better choices every day so that our economy isn’t driving by our consumption habits,” she said. “Consuming less will not only help our environment but improve our quality of life.”
• And, of course, the Dalai Lama took a very buddhist approach to the question of happiness: “Inner wealth is most important,” he said, “and that comes from human relationships. The ultimate source of a happy life and a peaceful life is within ourselves, not money.”

The Dalai Lama actually has a great sense of humor. I like him.

A supplemental economy

As I listened to the panelists respond to this question, I was again reminded of the gift economy. This is a concept I first discovered while reading Kim Stanley Robinson’s science-fiction trilogy about the colonization of Mars. In the second book, Green Mars, the colonists grapple with constructing a new economy, one that’s neither capitalist nor socialist, but something more sustainable. As part of that, a sort of background gift economy emerges where individual outposts share their surplus with others. It’s an important part of a larger economic model.

There are some obvious pragmatic problems to the gift economy. It’s a utopian ideal that operates best in the rarified air of argument and hypothesis, and is less likely to succeed (let alone be implemented) in the real world.

But while such a system might not be practical for an actual global (or national or municipal) economy, a culture of gift-giving can be an excellent supplemental economy, a voluntary means of building mutual goodwill among family, friends, and neighbors. A gift economy builds social capital, bringing communities closer together.

Some examples:

• If I have things that I do not use (as is often the case), and I pass these things on to people who will use them, I’m increasing their wealth and happiness at no cost to myself. This isn’t necessarily an altruistic action, but it is an action that improves the overall wealth of the community.
• When I give, whether time or material goods, to another person, I’m not just improving her physical life. I’m also creating, for lack of a better term, positive mental energy. I’m fostering mutual goodwill.
• When a group of people give together — especially when they give time — the result is often greater than the sum of the parts. Just as a group mentality can feed negative emotions and lead to negative consequences, the same group mentality can have positive results. After the Boston Marathon bombing, media outlets trumpeted the actions of the folks who rushed toward danger in order to help the wounded. My colleagues Nate St. Pierre and J. Money founded a group called Love Drop, a “a micro-giving network of people who unite as a community to help one person or family a month”. Etcetera.

Though I haven’t used it myself, I hear that FreeCycle is a great example of the gift economy. Here’s the group’s mission statement: “Our mission is to build a worldwide gifting movement that reduces waste, saves precious resources & eases the burden on our landfills while enabling our members to benefit from the strength of a larger community.”

The extraordinary power of compound kindness

We don’t need to sacrifice our own interests to participate in the gift culture or to generate social capital. It’s not a zero-sum game. Often, we can create win-win situations that allow everyone involved to profit.

The older I get, the more I’m convinced of the importance of social capital.

Social capital comes from building a broad network of relationships, a network that you can draw upon to help yourself and help others. This isn’t networking in the smarmy, slimy sense, but in the authentic “I’m your neighbor and your friend” sense. A complex network of people will have thousands (millions!) of connections, creating a powerful web of support. (You can see great examples of this in Ben Franklin’s autobiography and in Keith Ferrazzi’s Never Eat Alone.)

These networks are usually built through everyday kindnesses. These actions compound (just like compound interest) to yield larger returns in the future.

The broader your circle of friends, the bigger your family, the better you know your neighbors, and the more involved you are in your community, the more social capital you have. (And the more social capital you contribute to others — it’s a reciprocal thing!)

The post The Gift Economy and Social Capital appeared first on More Than Money.

A couple of years ago, during that period in which I thought I wanted to have dozens of sites devoted to dozens of topics, I started a blog called Awesome People.

Awesome People was designed as an antidote to all of the negative news on the web (and elsewhere). Every day, we’re bombarded by stories that highlight the worst of human nature. People can’t get enough of watching the misfortune of others.

Well, I don’t like it.

In response, I started a site that highlighted the good things people accomplish, the amazing things they do with their bodies and hearts and minds. Of all the blogs I’ve ever created, Awesome People is still my favorite. It’s the one that comes closest to capturing the way I see the world.

Last year, I gave up on the “dozens of sites” idea. Instead, everything I write lives here, at More Than Money. That means I should be sharing stuff about awesome people.

Here, for example, is a YouTube compilation that’s gone viral, a collection of videos from dashboard cameras in Russian cars that show people doing positive things:

This is truly great stuff.

Have you seen a story about awesome people? Drop me a line so that I can share it with readers.

The post Video: Random Acts of Kindness in Russia appeared first on More Than Money.

My work ethic has improved dramatically since I began taking ADD meds two weeks ago. Every day, I’m accomplishing before noon than I had been getting done in a week.

This morning, for instance, I got up at 6:30. I took the Vyvanse, then showered, shaved, and ate a good breakfast. Immediately, I got to work. I didn’t play on Facebook. I didn’t waste time reading about the Portland Timbers. I didn’t get sidetracked sorting comics. Instead, I wrote.

I spent the first part of the morning writing about money. I also wrote a couple of small pieces to publish here later. Mid-morning, I had a Skype conference with my friends, Luke and Jim. (We’ve decided to form a sort of braintrust to help each other further our professional goals. Watch out, world!) Finally, I spent a couple of hours editing the program for this year’s World Domination Summit.

By the time I’d come to a stopping point, it was past noon, which meant I’d missed my regular Crossfit class. I opted to go for a run instead. And while I was at it, I decided I’d swing by the hardware store to pick up a few small things.

The Road Less Traveled

I’m fortunate to live right next to the Springwater Trail [PDF], a multi-use path that runs more than twenty miles from downtown Portland to the suburbs. Quick access to this paved pathway was actually a huge selling point when I was considering this location. Living here, there are no excuses preventing me from biking or running. (And I don’t make any; I use the trail a lot.)

Today, I warmed up with a few pushups and lunges, then began an easy run toward downtown Portland. I passed an old couple out for a stroll. Several bikers dinged their bells as they zipped by me. I jogged past the amusement park, and I watched as a guy unhitched his trailer at the yacht club. When I reached Oaks Bottom, I cut over toward the wildlife refuge.

At this point, I ought to have continued up the bluff and then turned back toward the hardware store. But something made me take a different route. When I came to the trail at the bottom of the bluff, I followed it instead of taking my planned path. I’m glad I did.

The gravel trail wound through the trees, following the steep hillside. All around, the wildflowers were lush and green. Some were even beginning to bloom. (June is really wildflower season in this neck of the woods.) The birds in the branches tweeted and chirped, and on a couple of occasions, I startled large crows, which squawked and lofted away.

I slowed to a walk so I could take it all in.

I enjoyed glimpses of the wetlands, where I spied several herons standing in the water. I passed the mausoleum and walked into the open fields beyond. At the end of the trail, I picked a wild rose (my favorite flower!) to give to Kim. The trail turned into a gravel road which led me to Sellwood Park, and, eventually, to home.

The Happiness of Happenstance

Last weekend, I re-read one of my favorite books, Luck is No Accident [my review]. Paraphrased, the book’s central thesis is:

At the same time, I’ve been listening to the audio version of Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s The Black Swan (about which I’m sure to share more in the near future). Taleb explores “the impact of the highly improbable”. He argues that the truly important things in life are essentially unpredictable.

I set out this afternoon with two objectives: get some exercise and run some errands. I only accomplished one of these things. I guess you could argue that my getting sidetracked is only indicative of my ADD. I like to think that it shows I’m open to unplanned events, that I allow some unpredictability in my life.

I may not have made it to the hardware store today, but I feel like I gained some things that are more important.

• Now I know where the trail through the wildlife refuge is, and I know the sorts of plants and animals I can see while I’m on it.
• I’m fairly certain that the route I took today is about five kilometers, which is a good training distance for running.
• I found some spots to picnic with Kim.
• I spent some time in a reflective, meditative state, immersed in the nature around me.

I’ll run my errands at the hardware store tomorrow. Right now, it’s time to get back to work. I’m doing so with a smile on my face.

The post A Walk in the Woods appeared first on More Than Money.

On our final night in London last month, Kim and I had dinner with Laura Roeder and her husband, Chris Williams. They were married in November, roamed the States while waiting for Laura’s visa, and are now settling in the U.K.

Laura’s from Texas, and though she likes the U.K., she finds some things — such as converting temperatures from celsius to fahrenheit — a bit confusing. Chris, who is from England, has similar trouble with temperature conversion, but in the opposite direction.

“I have a little trick that makes converting celsius to fahrenheit pretty simple,” I said, taking a sip of wine.

“Really?” said Laura. “It never seems that simple. You have to subtract 32 and divide by nine-fifths or something like that. It’s complicated.”

“He can just do it in his head,” said Kim. I had spent the last month converting temperatures for her while we traveled across Europe.

“What’s the secret?” asked Chris.

The Secret to Converting Celsius to Fahrenheit

“The secret is to memorize a couple of ‘landmarks’,” I said. “For instance, most people know that zero degrees celsius and 32 degrees fahrenheit are the same. That’s your first landmark. Zero celsius is cold. In fact, it’s the freezing point.”

My friends, their mouths full of pizza, nodded in agreement. That was an easy one.

“Well, there are just a few other landmarks you need to know,” I said. “The first is fifty degrees fahrenheit, which is ten degrees celsius. That’s a cool day, but not a cold one.”

“Next is 68 degrees fahrenheit, which is a comfortable room temperature. That’s twenty degrees celsius. Easy, right?”

“Well, it’s not too hard so far,” said Chris. “Fifty is ten. Room temperature is twenty.”

“Right,” I said. For the next landmark, reverse the 68 degrees to get 86 degrees. Thirty degrees celsius is 86 degrees fahrenheit, which is a warm day. Finally, a hot day is forty degrees celsius, or 105 degrees fahrenheit.”

“That lets you count by ten degrees celsius,” said Laura, “but what about all the temperatures in between? What about 26 degrees celsius, for example?”

“There you have to do a bit of math,” I said. “But only a bit. And you don’t need to remember any complicated formulas. Instead, just remember that 18 fahrenheit degrees equal ten celsius degrees. Naturally that means that nine fahrenheit degrees is five celsius degrees. Now you can count by fives. For smaller increments, just estimate that two fahrenheit degrees is one celsius degree. Does that make sense?”

“I guess so,” said Kim.

“You wouldn’t want to use this method for science,” I said. “But for daily life, it works just great. And though it may sound a little complicated at first, it’s really very easy.”

“Who taught you that?” asked Chris.

“Nobody,” I said. “I just made it up myself. I’ve been doing it this way for ten or fifteen years. And to be honest, I now find that I think in celsius instead of fahrenheit. It makes sense once you get used to it.”

Kim and Laura and our enormous pizza…

How to Convert Celsius to Fahrenheit

Okay, in story form, this method might seem a little complicated. But it’s not. Let me give you a bullet-point summary:

1. To begin, memorize five easy landmarks:
   • Zero degrees celsius is 32 degrees fahrenheit. This is cold.
   • Ten degrees celsius is fifty degrees fahrenheit. This is cool.
   • Twenty degrees celsius is 68 degrees fahrenheit. This is comfortable.
   • Thirty degrees celsius is 86 degrees fahrenheit. This is warm.
   • Forty degrees celsius is 104 degrees fahrenheit. This is hot.
2. Next, remember that ten celsius degrees is equal to eighteen fahrenheit degrees. (It also helps to remember that five celsius degrees is nine fahrenheit degrees.)
3. Finally, know that you can estimate that one celsius degree equals two fahrenheit degrees.

Actually, that last tip is key. If you really want to make things easy on yourself, that’s the only thing you have to remember: You can estimate that one celsius degree is two fahrenheit degrees. Then when you here that it’s 26 degrees celsius outside, for instance, double that (52 degrees) and add it to 32. In this case, you’d end up with an estimate of 84 degrees fahrenheit. It’s actually 79 degrees fahrenheit, but 84 is probably close enough for your purposes, right?

Thermometer photo by .

The post An Easy Way to Convert Celsius to Fahrenheit appeared first on More Than Money.

A good friend emailed me looking for financial advice the other day. Pam wrote:

A friend of mine is getting married this summer and…blah blah blah. [The main story/question in Pam's email isn't germaine to this article. Plus it's private.]

My friend really wants a financial planner-type person to help them, but she realizes those people really are for people with money to invest (and ultimately pay the financial planner) and her issue is a shortage of money.

Are there neutral party, financially educated people to advise those who are trying to make good decisions but need some help to see all the implications? Where should she look?

Responding to Pam, I was reminded of a business I wanted to start several years ago, just after I sold Get Rich Slowly. At that time, I had a number of friends and family asking for financial advice. It occurred to me that there was a market for a new kind of financial professional. Here’s what I envisioned:

• I’d open a storefront in a small space in some sort of high-traffic area like a strip mall.
• My store would sell personal-finance related material, including a library of high-quality books, magazines, and software. (Yes, I know the market for PF software has now vanished.)
• The store would also offer workshops and classes about personal finance topics, including budgeting and investing.
• One special focus of the store would be financial education for children. Another would be entrepreneurship.
• The main feature of the store would be financial advice. People could drop in and/or make an appointment to chat with me about their financial problems. I’d listen to their situation, and then offer suggestions.

As I was writing to Pam this morning, I realized that this idea excites me even more today than it did four years ago. My skillset is well-suited to a business like this. I’d love to give it a go. There are, however, some problems.

• First, I’m wary of the legal implications. I’d do my best to give sound financial advice, but what if a person took my advice (on investing, for example) but then lost a bunch of money. What’s my liability? Worse, what if they did not take my advice but still blamed me for losing a bunch of money. What then?
• I’ve never owned a storefront before, and I’m not sure how much it would cost to run a place like this. (This is a minor concern, though.)
• I’d love to offer my services for free and only charge for books and software, etc. In reality, this model probably wouldn’t work. I don’t need to make a lot of money with this venture, but I do need to make enough to break even. And, ideally, I’d make enough to live on.
• I’m fortunate to have a free and easy lifestyle right now, one where I’m able to do what I want when I want. If I had a store, I’d have to be present when the store was open. (This could be solved by just being open whenever I wanted, but then that creates headaches for customers.)

I like the idea of creating and running some sort of “money store”, but I’m not ready to actually do anything about it. Maybe I should do some research. I could find out the legal ramifications of giving financial advice. I could figure out what sorts of products I could offer. I could learn how much it would cost to lease a space for the store.

Who knows? Maybe a couple of years from now, you’ll be able to walk into a store called Get Rich Slowly in your neighborhood…

The post A Store That Sells Financial Advice? appeared first on More Than Money.

Last night, Cody and I watched the Portland Timbers battle to a scoreless draw with the New England Revolution. Really, though, the soccer match was just an excuse for two friends to hang out for a few hours. We had a good time talking about life: about fitness (Cody is my Crossfit trainer), writing, relationships…and fear.

I told Cody how productive I’ve been since I started taking my ADHD meds a week ago. “It’s amazing how much I can get done in a day,” I told him. “I’m able to focus. I have no anxiety. I’m able to get started on stuff without being distracted. I don’t let myself get sidetracked by tiny little fears.”

“I’ve been wanting to talk to you about fear,” Cody told me. He knows it’s a pet subject of mine. Plus, I’ve been struggling in the gym since I returned from Europe. Lifts that should be easy for me are proving tough. I even dropped the bar last week, and the bar only had 165 pounds on it.

“I’ve noticed something about people who are learning to lift,” Cody said. “When you start lifting and you get near max efforts” — max efforts are lifts where you’re lifting the most you possibly can — “there’s a fear of getting under the bar. You’re afraid that you’ll drop it, or that you’ll hurt yourself.”

I nodded. I experience this all the time. I just experienced it yesterday while attempting the deadlift. My max deadlift is 345 pounds, but yesterday I was struggling at 275. When it came time to lift 315, I couldn’t do it, partially because I was afraid.

“I get afraid too,” Cody said. “Or I used to. When you do a lift, there’s this moment where you just stop thinking. You have to do the lift, and that means taking an action you’re afraid to do. In order to do that, you have to turn your brain off. It’s when beginners turn their brains off that they’re able to overcome their fear of lifting.”

“Well, instead of waiting for the moment when I’m no longer afraid — a moment that might not ever come if I keep thinking about it — I’ve learned to force myself to not think about it. I think this is key. Thought creates fear; action kills it.”

“I love that idea,” I said. “It reminds me of what I had to do when I went skydiving. I hate heights. And jumping out of an airplane scared me shitless. In order to go through with it, I had to turn my brain off.”

“Right,” Cody said. “You leapt without thought. And in weightlifting, you have to get under the bar without thought. When trying new foods, you have to eat without thought. And so on. You have to reach a point where you’re no longer thinking, you’re only acting.”

As I was falling asleep last night, I thought more about this notion: Thought creates fear; action kills it. It’s not a new idea, but it’s an important one. In his classic The Magic of Thinking Big — the book that’s the inspiration for my upcoming talks and ebook on overcoming fear — David J. Schwartz writes:

Action cures fear. Indecision, postponement, on the other hand, fertilize fear…When we face tough problems, we stay mired in the mud until we take action. Hope is a start. But hope needs action to win victories.

Schwartz proposes a two-step plan to cure fear and win confidence:

1. Isolate your fear. Determine exactly what it is that scares you.
2. Take action. Figure out what action will counter your fear.

“Hesitation only enlarges, magnifies the fear,” he writes. “Take action promptly. Be decisive.”

Obviously, this is easier said than done. Overcoming fear takes practice. Being decisive takes practice. You need to practice taking action. But from my experience, action is the antidote to fear. If fear is the mind-killer, action is the fear-killer.

What have you been putting off because you’re afraid? What action can you take today to overcome that fear?

The post Action Kills Fear appeared first on More Than Money.