By stuck I mean, feeling like they are in a dead end or in a rut or at a place where they don’t like themselves or their surroundings.

Is that you?

The funny part about these conversations with people who are feeling stuck is that there is far more complaining than doing. People whine more than fight for change. When I press them to do something about it they normally begin the litany of excuses of why they can’t do this or that. Here are a few phrases I’ve heard recently:

• “If I change roles I won’t be able to participate in a bonus share in a few years.”
• “My wife gets nervous when I talk about change so I just keep doing my deal even though I feel dead inside.”
• “My parents aren’t too keen with my radical thoughts about starting my own company.” (this guy was in his 30′s)
• “I might lose some salary and we are tight with our mortgage and things.”

Over and over and over again I hear people stuck by their own decisions and not willing to do certain things because of fear.

Again, is this you?

Steve Cockram, my business partner in our newest GiANT venture – GiANT Worldwide, has a method to help people truly understand themselves, their passions and their patterns in their personality. As he leads people through a deep dive into their lives he often finds that their limitations are a pattern developed at an early age. It is that inhibition button that people push when they get out of their comfort zone. He finds that it takes more than hints for people to get out of their ruts – it takes a rediscovery of your identity of who you really are.

The truth is that most adults choose to play the game of putting up with their dead end living instead of confronting the very core of who they are. Most of these people turn hope off but keep the whine on as they complain to themselves and those around them.

To get unstuck a person must gain the courage to look at their life objectively, understand their patterns of self-preservation and choose to make the difficult changes that could free them from the bondage they have created for themselves.

Sadly, very few people choose to do this.

For those with the guts to stop whining and start wining again, this blog post is for you!

*If any one needs help in understanding their identity simply send me an email at jeremie@giantimpact.com and we can discuss.

Anyone want to know how to do this? Well then the Kubicek’s can be your guinea pigs.

In early June, My wife, Kelly, and I are moving our three kids, Addison, Will and Kate, from Atlanta, Georgia to London, England. In the process of moving we decided to sell the majority of our belongings, including our home with its amazing backyard, furniture, cars (of which I drive an amazing Ford Raptor), etc. The decision was years in the making.

My wife and I have always been a bit adventurous. We kind of view the world with the attitude of “who says you can’t.” We have started companies and tried new ventures that have failed and succeeded. And yet, we have always wanted to live overseas with our kids. So, over the past year we realized it was time to transition from running our GiANT companies after six years to a new adventure. We prayed it out, thought it out and decided to create a new GiANT business that would allow us to work and live in England while continuing to serve leaders in the US as well.

Over Christmas of 2012, Kelly and I decided to go for it. Once that decision was made we began the transition process. So, here is how you sell your possessions and move your family.

1. Delight & Desire. I love the passage written by King David in Psalms 37:4 that says “delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” It is important to write down the desires of your heart. And it is even more important to delight yourself in the Lord. Your responsibility is to delight, His responsibility is to give you the desires of the heart. Do realize that this might take a decade or more. We started planning to move overseas 8 years ago.
2. Change Your Story. Everyone asks me, “are your kids okay with the move?” Absolutely! Our kids are a part of our story. They know we have been talking about it for years and the story we are creating for them is better than any story their friends are telling. Help your family get all in by crafting the story they can buy in to.
3. Blueprint the Plan. Lay out a simple plan that puts deadlines and timelines for your family to adjust to.
4. Organize your “Stuff”. We made three piles of our stuff. The keep forever pile, take to London pile and give/sell away pile. When I asked my 11 year old to do this she had 5 items in the ‘keep forever’ pile. I was amazed at her simplicity. She simply said, “I don’t really need to keep much stuff. I have a lot already.” That really impacted me.
5. Sell, Sell, Sell. My wife created a long list of items for sale. She invited several friends to look at the list that held reasonable prices on our stuff collected over 18 years of marriage. We had commitments to buy on our stuff in just under 10 days. We then got rid of the remainder of our things from clothes to books to toys, etc. It is one of the best feelings in my life – to be free from clutter and or possessions.
6. Pack Light. When we board the plane in June, the Kubiceks will be taking only what Delta will allow us to fit. Packing light is a new mantra for our family.
7. Buckle Up and Hold Tight. We don’t know what the next season will be like, but we know that we love each other and have a mission that is both inspiring and life giving. That is fuel in our tanks.

I do not want to make you envious. Remember, this has been an eight year journey. However, I would like to plant some seeds to tell you that homes, cars, possessions, kids travel sports leagues, family commitments and more should not impede the opportunity to tell a better story with your family and create an adventure that will shape the rest of our lives.

If you want to come see us we are actually opening up retreats for leaders to come experience the freedom that we are sharing above.

Don’t give in to the cares of the world, rather dream to do what you have always wanted to do. [Tweet This]

Be careful not to allow the transactions of your daily life to overwhelm you to the point that you forget about relationships.

Transactions separate, relationships unite.

The language you use shapes the culture of your organization, your home and even the culture of your relationships.

If you choose to use negative language then you have chosen to create a negative culture. If you choose empowering language then you will find an empowered environment.

Language can be found in your emails, your terminology for projects, the principles you choose to use and the metaphors that roll off your tongue. And the best person to affect positive change is you. You control your tongue.

So, take the time to craft the type of culture you desire. If you don’t want drama, don’t be dramatic. If you desire positive attitudes, bring it yourself. Choose to create the language that you want emulated and watch your culture shift to match that.

We have for years focused on a very positive culture at GiANT. We hire the right leaders who match the language of our culture and we talk about the culture and our mission quite often.

Don’t force anyone to wash your mouth out with soap. Instead, make a conscious choice to change your language and watch the culture adjust to it.

I have seen that a focused, energetic extrovert can impact the growth of an organization or of other people more rapidly than most. And I think I know precisely why. An energetic extrovert carries their battery with them, while introverts must go away for hours of recharge in isolated places.

This is not a blog stating that extroverts are better. In all reality, extroverts can drive most people crazy (again, I know first hand).

Exponential growth occurs when there is alignment of strategy, people, capital and favor or customer demand. When an extroverted leader aligns this exponential growth with their own ENGAGEMENT and EFFICIENCY, sparks fly.

If an extrovert is not engaged and is not efficient in their management of time and people then a different E word occurs – Exasperation.

One of the best Extroverted leaders I know is Chris Carneal, Founder and CEO of Boosterthon. This guy has led a company to exponential growth in their business of helping schools increase their fund raising and educate students on fitness, character and leadership. I have watched the growth of this company over the past five years as they now have hundreds of twenty something’s serving schools and students all over the country.

What I have watched is an Energizer rabbit type leader (Chris Carneal) grow a business with excellence and speed. Their secret of growth at Booster lies in two parts:

1. They have created a clear product, aligned energetic young talent to a strong mission and driven efficiencies as they grow the business.
2. Chris is unbelievably engaged.

There are thousands of organizations that do number one, but far fewer who have a leader engaged for long periods of time.

No one is perfect and yes I know there have been moments of exasperation with Chris and his relentless energy and intoxicating vision. Yet as Chris matures he only refines his energy for the right moments and right times and the company continues to grow.

If you are an extrovert, are you engaged, energetic, and efficient?
If you are an introvert, can you help us extroverts become more engaged, energetic and efficient?
If you do, we will bring exponential growth assuming our ducks are in a row.

From first hand experience I can tell you that it is always more fun to have exponential growth in an energized and efficient culture. You just need to put up with the fast charging extroverts in the process.

It is completely okay to need to recharge by retreating. Western culture doesn’t value retreat as much as it should and our pharmacy shelves are lined with purple pills and drugs to relieve our overly ambitious culture of workers.

The introvert brings intuitive skills to our world that needs to be lifted up – namely in rhythm of work and recharging. Extroverts tend to flame out. Introverts understand pace and that pace is like a metronome that keeps organizations and family units on beat.

One of the best introverts I know is Chris Ediger. He is Vice President of Systems and Operations at GiANT Impact. He is one of the most revered leaders in the GiANT World for his steady, methodical leadership and calm demeanor. Chris regularly maintains his demeanor with the right amount of sharpening and his understanding of when to plug in for a power boost.

Not only does he display the proper amount of work and rest but he immolates integrity to all that connect with him. Typically people leave his presence with a “wow, that guy is smart and I really like him.” We have now worked together for over 5 years and I must say that I value his skills more than ever.

The introvert with integrity and intellect can create an environment of patience, level-headedness and competency. These intuitive skills are fuel to a growing company.

Introverts balance extroverts well.
Introverts with character and competency are the oil that fast growth companies need so they don’t burn out.

Extrovert’s, don’t burn out the introverts. Value them and learn something from their intuitive skillsets.

What are your thoughts on the balance of introverts and extroverts in leadership?

“I don’t feel like it.”

Ever said that?

We all have. There are certain things that we don’t “feel” like doing almost every day.

• I don’t feel like writing a contract.
• I don’t feel like talking to them.
• I don’t feel like working in the yard.
• I don’t feel like going to dinner with them.

The next time you say that to someone or your self, take a moment and analyze why you don’t “feel” like doing something. Is it because:

1. You don’t want to deal with an issue right now? If so write out the issue on a piece of paper. What is the problem, who is involved and what needs to take place right now? Then ask yourself what happens if you don’t deal with it soon and make a decision on what to do next.
2. You don’t want to be with people? Maybe it is a recharge issue and you just need time. Do what you need to do.
3. You don’t want to be with specific people? Do certain people drive you crazy? Maybe you need to do a better job of saying no to people.

Take control of they way you “feel”. If you don’t you will create a persona around you that you probably don’t want. Be honest with the way you feel and address quickly. You will find yourself to be both, more engaged and more engaging.

…leaders sought to be secure in humility as much as they sought to be secure through knowledge?

…leaders learned to follow as much as they tried to lead?

…leaders would focus on the greater good for others more than on their own personal power?

…leaders could encourage others while on the journey as much as they fixate on the end goal?

…leaders dealt with their own fear as voraciously as they deal with cutting costs?

Can you imagine the impact these “what if’s” would have if they were practiced more often?

How might our cultures look or our people live?

You ready to start?

If you want to explore more go to www.chickfilaleadercast.com.

If you want to attend the live site experience that is like no other come to Atlanta for the May10th event and sign up on the website above.

If you would like to bring this event into your company we have made it easy. Simply talk to one of our leadership concierge’s for the details at www.chickfilaleadercast.com

We have hundreds of sites broadcasting this event into their workplaces for both the benefit of their employees and their communities.

We know that most adults have A.D.D. and are highly cynical to leader development. That is why we have crafted something that overcomes those issues and inspires, educates and entertains.

Join the experience and thanks for giving yourself away to others.

2013 Chick-fil-A Leadercast from GiANT Impact on Vimeo.

I grabbed a marker and headed to the white board to draw a large plus sign for our discussion. What I shared with him may be helpful for you and / or for someone you know looking for a different career or a job itself.

Think of work as a portfolio not a linear time line of a job.

When you think of ‘portfolio’ you often think of money. Most of us have a financial portfolio with levels of risk from low to high. The same can occur with all of us as we look at work differently.

What are you interested in pursuing? Where does your passion meet your skills? What opportunities do you have in front of you?

Back to the plus sign. Draw a big plus sign and begin building your portfolio.

What if your job was a collection of jobs that all met your interests?

I have one friend moving to England around the same time we are with plans to:
1. Continue his event planning company in England as well as
2. Starting a non-profit and
3. Offering consulting.

These three are his job and make up the bulk of his salary and his time in areas of interest.

Another friend of mine had four areas that made up his life work.
1. Executive coaching
2. Started a vacation rental business
3. Managed real estate
4. Started a cleaning business.

This portfolio not only paid the bills but also gave him time to figure out which one of these fit him best. Two years later his portfolio has focused to the vacation rentals business and to managing real estate. His coaching is now a part of his giving back to younger leaders.

Don’t rely on a job to fit your needs. Create a portfolio of opportunity that will open doors of opportunity while you try each opportunity on for size.

Once you have drafted your portfolio then simply add potential % amounts to each section and then the time which you think it will take in percentages and the desired time for each. Here is an example that a young leader might create:

1. Work at ABC corp part time as marketing coordinator – $3K per month; 30% time
2. Create a web app company – $0 currently; 50% of my time moving to 75% of my time in future.
3. Teaching marketing at … $500 per month, 5% of time
4. Property Management at K properties – $1500 per month; 15% of time

What is your portfolio?
Practice building one and see how it changes your view of work.